Saturday, December 26, 2009

WOW WHAT A GREAT CHRISTMAS ....

...... with so much good food, champagne, time spent with family and presents.

I must have been a very good girl this year because Santa was very generous. Amongst my pressies were the following favourites: a new digital camera (my old one was almost an antique), Skins tights, a sleeveless Skins top, a pedometer, an Oggi drink bottle, the new Paullina Simons book, earrings, a necklace and some of those cool iPod headphones that hook around your ears (I cant keep the bud styles in my ears).

If it wasnt so late I'd post up some piccies and write more about the day and do one of those 2009 wrap ups that every else is blogging about but its time to head off to bed and hope that I have time to blog again tomorrow.

Cheers all

M

Wednesday, December 23, 2009

REVEALING ALL

Life is strange.
Life is unpredictable.
Life is wonderful.
Life is magical.

Life will take you in one direction and then BANG a chain of events will change that direction forever. This is whats happened to us and we are excited and exhilirated (me) and stressed and nervous (Peter) all at the same time.

Without turning this into a War and Peace epic I will summarise briefly that we are no longer going down the path to a massive new home in the burbs but are looking to buy something small, functional and charming from around the turn of the century that is walking distance to the city.

We love where we are now and the amazing lifestyle that this allows us. We have awesome cafes, restaurants, shops and boutiques just walking distance away and we can walk to work. It doesnt get much better than this and this is where we want to live in a house that gives us what we need without a lot of what we dont.

Yes the road to get here has been very stressful but I believe that all good things have to be worked for, waited for and sweated for. It makes them that much more appreciated when they eventuate. So we're on the house-hunting merry-go-round and yes we have already missed out on one house that we both loved :-(

Christmas is fast approaching and there is so much to finalise in the next couple of days. Even the lead up to now has been really busy, hence the lack of blogging and reading other blogs. I have many blog posts to catch up on when time permits.

On a personal level I'm still doing really well and this has actually become the norm and is no longer the exception to be amazed over. Sure there are days when I eat a bit too much but they naturally balance out with days where I eat less. I'm keeping up with my running as best I can as I'm now on holidays and not getting up at 5am. Again its a case of going with the flow and not stressing out if a session is missed. My headspace is good and I'm looking forward to my first Christmas (other than if I've been sick) where I dont eat til I'm ready to burst and gain the usual 3 or so kilos from all of the overindulging.

I'm planning a new look blog for 2010 as I can feel that it'll be an awesome year with new ventures, new challenges and an even happier and more positive outlook on life. But til then there is family time to be enjoyed, good food to be shared, nice wine to savour, a road trip and a holiday on the magical Sunshine Coast with my family. I'm off to wrap presents and I wish you all a very merry Christmas and a happy and healthy new year. Take a moment to give thanks for all you have, for all thats good in your life and for all you have worked hard to achieve. I know I will.

Cheers

Magda

Monday, December 14, 2009

I MUST REMAIN CRYPTIC

Thank you again to all the lovely ladies in blogland who left supportive and thoughtful comments when I felt way down in the dumps. I really appreciate your concern and caring.

Things picked up after a couple of days and we're over it now. I'm sorry I must remain cryptic as there are some "i"s to dot and some "t"s to cross and then I'll feel better about blogging just whats been going on. Not long now, I promise.

In actual fact I have quite a lot  I want to write about but time is scarce tonight and will be leading up to Christmas. I guess thats pretty typical for this time of year. But in a nutshell I have been feeling quite awesome and going through some amazing changes on a physical level and an emotional one too. I'm surprising myself even, you could say. When I made the statement that December was going to be great, I didnt even realise how great it could be, even despite the events of early last week.

So I'll leave it there for tonight and hope that I can squeeze in a nice lengthy blog and share my news, achievements and inner most thoughts (well some of them anyway LOL).

Cheers all

Magda

Monday, December 07, 2009

ME AND MY MISERY

I dont have time to post the details tonight but things have not worked out as planned and as we wanted.

I'm disappointed.

I'm angry.

I'm sad.

I'm mad.

I'm going to sign off there for now and post again when I'm in a better headspace.

Oh BTW Peter says tonight "I'm so depressed now I just want to eat." I totally understand this feeling but now I know and truly believe that its not the long term answer nor is it a short term fix. I didnt even crave wine tonight. Me and my misery are fine just as we are LOL.

Magda

Sunday, December 06, 2009

CALLING ON THE POWER OF ATTRACTION

OMG things are hotting up and my excitement level is going through the roof. Stay tuned. I cant blog about it just yet but it wont be long. I have a good feeling though and my intuition is pretty good so here's hoping it doesnt let me down.

Weekend has been awesome. Getting some good news on Thursday certainly helped. Had a champagne with my work colleagues on Friday afternoon and that got the weekend off to a nice start. Peter is a different person since it looks like the shitty matter I blogged about previously is being resloved, a much nicer person and life is just better all round.

But there's always something to keep a small thorn in my side. This time its my right leg which is aching BADLY. I've self diagnosed that its from my running more often and for longer times and being slack with my stretching. Errr like not stretching AT ALL. So on Friday morning as I was trying to do my sprints my leg was aching like mad in the walk intervals. Of course I ignored it and pressed on but have been a bit more diligent about stretching. So much so that on Saturday I skipped my legs weights session and just did some stretching/mobility/prehab work instead and then followed it up with an hour of mixed cardio (bike/walking/bike). Then finished off with more stretching. Geez that felt good.

Today has been close to a "perfect day". Had a little sleep in. Did my upper body weights session and abs. My boys went to play golf so I had the place to myself for a while :-) After weights I had a blueberry pancake for breakfast and a quick shower. Then I walked very briskly for a little over an hour to meet my boys for a special purpose (sorry its all a part of what I cant blog about just yet). Fingers, toes, everything is crossed. We had lunch out and then walked to a nice park for our son to have a play. One more thing to do out and then came home, put the Chrissie tree up and before we knew it the day was just about over.

I have a good feeling about this week. I'm going to get my right leg sorted out and then it'll be perfect. I can feel it in my heart and if ever the power of attraction was going to work, this is the time.

:-) Magda

Friday, December 04, 2009

NOVEMBER REPORT

So November is history and we are powering forward to Christmas. Here is my November round up.

NUTRITION

Once again I had a pretty good month but I did succumb to 2 (or maybe 3) binging episodes. One could be explained by the fact that I had eaten too little for a few days. The second was in response to a stressful situation at work. These arent justifications for binging but cold hard fact that old thought patterns returned, dominated and old behaviours resulted. The critical thing about these is that I react differently now and dont waste energy and emotion on beating myself up, punishing myself with a strict diet or tons of exercise to compensate. I also remind myself that although I may have eaten badly, that doesnt make me a bad person. Very different thought patterns to those previously.

November saw me leaving behind more of my old "diet foods" and embracing more vegetarian meals which I am really enjoying. Tabbouli has been a regular food with added 3 or 4 bean mix which I love. My blueberry pancakes continue to be my favourite breakfast. They NEVER disappoint. I'm loving my daily skim cappuccinos and the fact that little treats are now a normal part of my life which I enjoy without guilt. Oh and having wine in moderation a few nights a week is just bliss. All these things make me a happy and relaxed person instead of always stressing about how I was going to avoid the foods and wine that I shouldnt be having.

TRAINING

November saw a new routine being established after finding my feet in a new home, new suburb and new circumstances. I'm running more and weight training less and surprisingly I'm loving it. Well maybe not so surprising, as running when you're 10 kilos lighter than you've been for a couple of years is not quite so bad. So after settling into a routine that I loved, its time to uproot it all and go with the flow as school holidays, my own holidays and life in general all turn things upside down. Lucky I'm not too much of a stresshead to let this get me down.

I'm looking forward to setting some training goals for next year to give me a challenge to work towards. Ideas are floating around in my head but need some research.

HEADSPACE

In the main my headspace has been good. But I wont lie about the difficulty of putting things into perspective after a binging episode. It would be so easy to revert to all my old reactions but I know they would just add fuel to the fire and I'd be in a downward spiral so fast that it'd be scary. So I train my brain to think differently, see things differently and hence react differently. Yep it takes some effort but the outcome is worth it. I can honestly say that I'm a more balanced, calm and happy person than I was 6 months ago.

But I'm human and I struggle with areas of my life that arent exactly as I'd like them. The problem is that I dont even know how I'd like them to be exactly. (Does that make sense??) Couple that with not being willing to risk things that are really important to me and I may just have to remind myself that this is a choice I make. Its a issue I grapple with every so often but I cant see a win win solution to it.

ME AND THE METAL MONSTER

In late November I hopped onto my trusty friend / enemy out of curiosity and was pleasantly surprised to see a loss of another 1.3kgs. I was sitting in the 62s and for my 171cm height and medium to large frame this is a nice weight and I look and feel good. I didnt do measurements but you know, who cares? There'll be a bit off here and there. In the scheme of life and whats important , thats not. I may weigh again for an "official end of November" weight and then I may not. Is that number important? Hell no!!

FINALLY

You may recall that some weeks ago I blogged about an exciting change of direction that was on the cards for us. This then turned into a shitty and stressful issue that plagued us for several weeks although I couldnt give details. Well yesterday we were finally able to resolve the issue and it'll be settled and finalised soon so stay tuned for a blog about this exciting venture.


I'm relishing December and the festive season already. I love it when our family is all together. I love the shops being busy as with people madly buying up presents. I love seeing Christmas trees, Christmas lights in people's gardens and Christmas decorations all around. I love getting lots of invites to Christmas celebrations and going along and enjoying them, guilt-free. I can feel that December will be a fantastic month and a great end to the year.

Cheers all

Magda

Wednesday, December 02, 2009

IDEALESS AND LACKING INSPIRATION

During the day I get all these brilliant ideas for blog posts. They start with catchy titles and then ideas of what to write. I get quite inspired.

Then I sit down to read blogs and post my own later in the evening and I'm dead tired, idealess and lacking inspiration.

I'm due to do a November report but will tackle it when I feel better and my thoughts are clearer. I think it'd just be a jumbled mess if I wrote it tonight.

So on that note I'll sign out for today. It has been a good day. My eating is as I want it to be. Training today was an upper body weights circuit done on my back lawn. Not a favourite workout but a workout that suited my circumstances. I walked from work to my son's school this afternoon but didnt walk in the morning. Went and had coffee out with Peter as he was off work today. I'm feeling good within myself despite carrying some tummy bloat after Monday's overeating. It'll correct itself soon so I'm not stressing about it. Its good to be over the hump this week and getting closer to the weekend.

Cheers all

M

Tuesday, December 01, 2009

FORGIVING, NURTURING AND HEALING

Today was a day of forgiving, nurturing and healing.

Forgiving because yesterday I abused my body with poor food choices in quantities that can only be described as "oh lordy, where did I put all that?" Yep I faced a stressful situation at work and let it overcome me and I resorted to my old habits and ways of thinking. I do know better now but the voice of reason was too quiet to be heard. Whats done is done and I've moved onwards and upwards without the obligatory self punishment that normally accompanied such episodes.

Nurturing because I'm wise enough to realise that self punishment is not the answer and is in fact detrimental and is likely to trigger more such behaviours. So today I nurtured myself with a jog/walk in the morning and had a good think about it all. I treated myself to breakfast out on the way to work. Yep I no longer try to make up for a binge by dieting strrictly the next day. I eat what I fancy and stop when I'm satisfied, making sure I enjoy every mouthful. Now thats my idea of nurturing and I've done it enough to know that my body will balance itself out in a few days.

Healing because after yesterday I felt fragile, doubtful and my self esteem had taken a bit of a knock. To heal I take the pressure off myself. I dont set my expectations sky high. I remind myself how far I've come, how much I've learnt and how by believing in myself I will succeed in slaying my Binge Monster once and for all.

Today has been a good day and I'm feeling like I'm well on the way to being on top of the world where I usually reside. Its a great view from up there and one I want to be enjoying many days of my life.

:-) M

Monday, November 30, 2009

PASSION


Passion (from the Latin verb patior, meaning to suffer or to endure, also related to compatible) is an emotion applied to a very strong feeling about a person or thing. Passion is an intense emotion compelling feeling, enthusiasm, or desire for something. The term is also often applied to a lively or eager interest in or admiration for a proposal, cause, or activity or love.

I love the word "passion" and all that it conjers up. If you have passion you have enthusiasm, drive and a genuine love that is not false. When people are passionate about something you can see it in their eyes, hear it in their voice and feel it eminating from them. Its positive energy and it breeds more positive actions and feelings.

I'm passionate about living a healthy balanced life. I'm passionate about eating good food thats nutritious, tastes great and is good for me. I'm passionate about enjoying treats in moderation so that life is enjoyed and not lived as a string of denials and deprivation. I'm passionate about running and weight training and how great both make me feel. I'm passionate about taking good care of myself physically and mentally. I havent discovered spirituality. There are many more things I'm passionate about.

But sadly there are things that I'm just NOT passionate about and despite telling myself that its all good and how good I've got it and how lucky I am, I'm just not fooling myself. Makes THAT aspect of my life difficult.

So deep down I know I'm capable of so much more. My journey is still in its early phases. There is still a long way to go and my route hasnt been mapped out. But without this passion in another slice of my life's pie I find I'm stumbling along. Taking some steps forward and then falling over again. I want to get up and run. I need to get up and run but I keep tripping over my own feet and falling down.

The solution is out there or maybe its in me. Time to go and take a long hard look.

M

Sunday, November 29, 2009

A NEW PLAN AND GOING WITH THE FLOW


This pic was taken about a month ago on a freezing cold Sunday at the zoo. Hence the (skinny) jeans, boots and fur lined jacket. LOL. A month later and whilst its not freezing cold, its certainly not hot like its been for some time now.

Well another weekend has whizzed by in the blink of an eye. This one was unusual in that the weather has turned back to cool and rainy throwing some of our original plans into disarray. We were planning to go the Symphony Under the Stars concert on Saturday night but it was cancelled due to persistent rain. So we just went to our local cafe for dinner and then came home. I spent the rest of the evening ironing :-(
Today I took my son to a birthday party which I enjoyed as much as him. I love catching up with the other mums and dads. Not much else today.
I'm changing my training routine again. Not by want but by need. We have noticed that on days when I train using weights, our son wakes up too early from the noise which is unavoidable. I feel sorry for him when he's obviously quite tired from the early starts. So my new plan is this:
Saturday: lower body + abs + cardio if time permits
Sunday: upper body + cardio if time permits
Monday: 1 hour jog.
Tuesday: 1 hour walk/jog or jog again (if feeling ok) - I like to do two longer sessions at the start of the week.
Wednesday: upper body - modified session with DBs on back lawn + abs
Thursday: 40 minute jog/run
Friday: 30 minute sprint intervals
Plus I have 2 days a week where I walk to/from work at 35-40 minutes each way.
The following week my son finishes school and the schedule will change again. I dont even know why I plan a schedule sometimes. I'm coming into a period of "just going with the flow" by the looks of it. Maybe my new goal will be "just get it done".
Cheers all
Magda

Thursday, November 26, 2009

JUST SLAP ME .....

.... the next time I complain about my job. I had the most awesome day today and felt ashamed of my recent pathetic attitude about work. Today really confirmed that I have a great job.

In our small team is a lovely American woman whom I shall call Miss M. Today Miss M organised for our small team to visit one of our most magnificent assets with a fascinating history, magnificent grounds and a majestic historical residence. We arrived at 10.30 to be greeted with real coffee from the on-site coffee shop, home made rock cakes and a magnificent apple tart. Yes morning tea was delicious. Then the Director of this "estate" took us on a guided tour of the grounds and building. Along the way he entertained us with many stories about the history of the place, how it operates now and what the future aspirations are. This is all valuable information that helps us do our jobs better and its just bloody fascinating anyway.

After the tour we bought lunch from the coffee shop and dined in their marquee overlooking the magnificent gardens with views of Adelaide in the distance. Miss M reminded us that today is Thanksgiving and she explained the intent of the day (no presents, its a family day of eating together and giving thanks). Then we all spoke about what we were thankful for before having our meal. Hearing what everybody said and echoing their positive words about our great team and workplace, I came away with a very warm and fuzzy feeling and a turned around glass half full perspective on the whole work thing.

Then to put some icing on the cake for us all, Miss M provided pumpkin pie for afternoon tea for everybody back at the office. I wasnt going to have any but when I thought of the significance of it and what it meant to her, I couldnt be that selfish to refuse it. So afternoon tea was delicious too :-)

I'm so thankful that I was given the opportunity to work in such a great place with great people. I'm thankful that I have a wonderful family, fantastic friends and a charmed life. I'm thankful for my health and my family's health and for every risk I've taken and opportunity I've grabbed to live my life so that I dont die wondering "what if?"

What are you thankful for?

M

Wednesday, November 25, 2009

TO BLOG OR NOT TO BLOG

Today was awesome. Maybe it was the jog/run this morning that managed to turn my shitty mood from yesterday into a happy and positive one today. Maybe it was the walk to work. Maybe it was just me reminding me that on some days it'll take a conscious effort to be happy until happiness overrules anyway. Today was that day.

I'm counting down 16 more days before I'm on Christmas holidays. I cant wait. I'm sad to admit that my enthusiasm for work is lacking at the moment. Sometimes it takes a big effort to stay focussed and tackle the jobs that you dread. Of course those times dont help with my general disposition. Bring on that holiday!!

On my walk home this afternoon I was pondering the questions of to blog, or not to blog and if so what to blog. I find my blog is really repetitive and quite frankly boring. I need some inspiration to blog about interesting things, thought provoking things, things to challenge our minds. I've always had an interest in and passion for writing but it feels dead right now. Oh how to breathe some life back into it?

Magda

YESTERDAY'S POST

This is yesterday's post that I just couldnt get onto Blogegr for a variety of annoying reasons.

I’ll make no secret of it, but I’m struggling doing leg training on top of my running. I’ve modified my program so it’s shorter and includes the “leg must dos” and ditches the rest. So I’m doing stiff legged deadlifts, split squats and squats with a plate(s) as space is an issue with the barbell on my shoulders. That’s also a nice mix of love/hate exercises and for me; it’s an effective mix. So why do I do it? Vanity baby. Vanity. My thighs are definitely my worst feature and whilst I know I should love them unconditionally, I’d like them to look better so that means putting in some extra effort. Oh and yes the focus is mainly on hammies and glutes, which need the most work. Last week I suffered through every minute of my leg session so I approached it with a mild dread this morning. Luckily today’s session was much better and I was quite elated at the end of it. Love it when that feeling takes over.

I’m also toying around with a slightly different diet (meaning the food I consume and not a regimented and restricted plan). For a few years now I’ve had the high protein, low-moderate carbs and moderate fat way of eating hardwired as the way to eat to get lean and stay lean. I would strive for this daily almost being anal about not eating starchy carbs at lunchtime and heaven forbid having them with my evening meal. They were banned!!

But I’m slowly letting go of my vision of myself as a figure athlete who needs to eat in this way. I no longer train with weights 4 or 5 times a week where my goal is to put on muscle. I train with weights to maintain muscle tone and what little strength I have. Don’t get me wrong. I still lift what’s heavy for me (no pissy little 1 or 2 kg dumbbells for me – I’m hurting by the end of each set) but some muscle groups get as little as one exercise / session and that suits me just fine now.

What I am developing though is a vision of myself as a runner (with a lean and toned upper body) and runners need more carbs for fuel. So slowly I’ve been adding some (mainly good) carbs back into my diet and I must say “YUMMO”. I’m also decreasing my meat intake and experimenting with vegetarian meals that still provide protein through correct food combining. This week I’ve enjoyed home made hummus with tabbouli and felafels in a wholemeal wrap for lunch. Its all good clean food that I’ve made myself and I’m really enjoying this change. The other benefit I’d like to see from this is that hopefully my system will work a little better and not require artificial help on a daily basis. I don’t fancy battling bowel cancer because I ate so much meat and so little grains.

So that’s what’s happening in my health and fitness life right now. There’s plenty more going on but too early to blog about it and heaps of stuff that I’m sure you’re not the least bit interested in. Hahahaha that’s assuming you’re interested in the stuff I wrote about today:-)

Magda

Monday, November 23, 2009

CURIOUS SOUL

I'm a curious soul. Always wondering about this and that, pondering that and this and just wanting to know stuff. Since I've been doing my one hour jogs (clocked up a few weeks in a row now) I've become curious about the distance I cover. So today I logged onto mapmyrun.com and after much trial and error managed to map out the route I jogged this morning.

Drum roll please......

..... approximately (I'd say within 100 metres of) 8.25kms. Thats nothing ground breaking or earth shattering as its actually quite slow but hey I NEVER STOP OR TAKE A WALK REST. By the end of it I can feel my quads and adductors getting sore and tired and I visualise my thighs getting leaner, firmer and having beautiful toned muscles on them LOL.

I'd love to do a 10km test run to see what time I do it in and then aim for improving but thats a fair whack of time to devote when weekends are already really busy and I'm often struggling to get 30 minutes of training in, let alone well over an hour. I'm sure the opportunity will present itself sooner or later and I'll give it a go.

Who knows what else I'll aim for in the future. I've been avoiding setting goals for reasons that are valid to me. But maybe a goal thats NOT all about weighing a certain amount by a certain time, or fitting into this or that by a deadline is the stimulation I need to push myself out of my comfort zone.

Cheers all

Magda

SAILING CALM SEAS AND REFLECTING

Since my last post through some rough seas my sailing vessel has swayed side to side, done a massive list taking on more water than it would normally cope with (yep there was a binge in there on Thursday afternoon – so much for trying to coach myself out of it), righted itself and sailed steadily through the storm only to enjoy calm seas again the next day. Yes there was the odd small wave but it was all handled beautifully once I took my sailing skills back to basics and just did what I do as normal these days.

Friday started with my sprint runs session and I added some brisk walking at the end of it as I was up earlier than I needed to be. Waited til I was hungry before eating. Spontaneous lunch out with my work colleagues? I’m in. Ordered food I love and ate til I was satisfied. Had a wine as well. Dinner followed suit. No trolling for more food or junk after the meal. Feeling like my old self again and certainly not beating myself up over the events of the previous day.

I knew that everything was 100% again when standing at the Bakers Delight counter on Saturday waiting for my (son’s) bread there were Christmas mince pies out for tasting. Normally I LOVE mince pies and would always take a taste (and often buy one or two to have then) but I looked at them and wasn’t even the slightest bit tempted to have any.

On Sunday I had breakfast with the beautiful Kristy who I haven’t seen face to face since 2007 when we ran together in the early mornings when I was preparing to compete. She also worked with Hilde when I did and we often emailed each other for support. Well Kristy is looking great and whilst she also faces challenges similar to me (and a lot of others) she has made some serious inroads into working out the whole food / mind / attitude puzzle for weight loss and maintenance.

Finally, the things that have really hit home since last week’s events are:

Llife will always throw curve balls. Sometimes we’ll catch them and throw them back. Sometimes they’ll be massive boulders that’ll knock us to the ground. We can choose to lie there crying over our failing or we can get the f*ck up, dust ourselves off and make sure that catcher’s mitt is better placed when the next curve ball comes flying towards us.

I’m not perfect. I wont get it right all the time. I will stuff up. But I will forgive myself quickly and absolutely. I will put a smile on my face the next day and be truly thankful in my heart for all the great things in my life. I’ll follow my principles and beliefs for living my life knowing that my choices ultimately help me achieve what I want and therefore make me happy.

Magda

Thursday, November 19, 2009

A BIT OF SELF ANALYSIS

Well there is no doubt that this week has been one of some challenging mind games. As I reflect back over it all I put the pieces of the puzzle together and realise that it stems from my under-eating at the beginning of the week.

Eating mindfully or intuitively is tricky. No point asking myself at lunch time what do I feel like eating? Lunch is made the night before, packed and brought to work with me. If I didn’t do this I’d spend a small fortune buying something every day from city food outlets. No thank you. I’d rather spend my money on more worthwhile things. And I find that I genuinely don’t get properly hungry at those previous 3 hourly intervals. I thought I was doing great and feeling fine eating a bit less. My body thought otherwise and then sent some crazy signals to my brain like “ warning warning starvation alert” (well not exactly but you get the gist).

This set the old diet/binge mentality back into action, hence the struggles I’ve had this week coupled with the feeling of incredible tiredness. Yep this was my life when I was on the diet merry-go-round earlier this year. It was a pretty miserable existence as I constantly binged, beat myself up over it and punished myself with more and more restrictive dieting. Breaking free from this cycle around the middle of the year was life changing for me.

But I realise that moving on from that behaviour to my current lifestyle is not as simple as closing one door behind me and then living happily ever after in my “new place”. Many years ago I read a statement written by Dr Phil in his weight loss/management book (sorry I forgot the title of it but it was very good as it focussed as much on the psychology of it all rather than just eat this / don’t eat that and move more). Dr Phil’s statement was along the lines of “overweight is never cured. Its managed” and I believe its totally correct.

If you have been overweight and lived on the diet merry-go-round you’ll know that losing weight and keeping it off is something that you must work at constantly. There is never a day where you can say, “I’m not at any risk of regaining the weight I’ve lost” or “No matter what I do today or over the next three months my weight will remain stable”. Deep in our subconscious we engage the strategies we use to manage our weight at a level we find acceptable. Those strategies may be physical ones like dieting and/or training a certain way or they may be mental strategies we use to manage our eating through internal mindful processes rather than external control.

So this week has seen me peeking back through that door I thought was closed behind me. It’s ajar and I’ve poked my nose back into that room only to be reminded of what a painful place that was. Its also driven home the point that I can’t take my new place for granted. There are things I must do on an ongoing basis to remain happy in this place.

I have chosen to step off the diet merry-go-round and with this comes a new set of responsibilities and actions to ensure that I don’t end up looking like the Michelin Man. I’ve explored what feels right for me. I’ve tested it over a few months. I take responsibility for my decisions and I maintain control over what I do. Mind games may come to tease me every so often but if I stay true to me those challenges can be faced and conquered.

Magda

Wednesday, November 18, 2009

ORDINARY VS TOTALLY CR*PPY

Today I just have to accept that I feel ordinary. Not great, nor good just ordinary. If I was honest I'd describe it as a "fat day". You known when you look down and your stomach looks 5 months preggo or your thighs look like big fat slabs of lard LOL. Well I had a stomach moment this morning. Silly isnt it?

My mood has been soso and some unexpected events had some of my destructive old thought patterns return with a vengeance. Although I had my lunch with me today, I got invited to a lunch meeting and my colleague and I talked through some really important work issues over lunch at a nearby pub. I ate well, mindful of my recent undereating and then found myself craving sweets after. And I dont mean a sweet I mean several. Like I wanted to have a binge. WTF!!!???? Not hungry. Just wanted to eat lots of sweets.

I didnt do it because I knew I didnt really want them and decided to just acknowledge and then ride with the feeling. Luckily I had a meeting take up a lot of my afternoon and then I could come home a bit earlier than normal and get stuck into domestic chores. Lo and behold by 6pm I was hungry for dinner which was just ideal.

This is a massive achievement for me. I have rarely had the urge to binge since adopting the "no-diet-approach" so it was unexpected and a bit unsettling today. It would have been so easy to just give in and stuff myself because thats a coping mechanism I'm used to but I wanted a different outcome so different actions were in order.

Hence I sit here tonight still feeling ordinary but happy in myself that I didnt turn the ordinary into "totally cr*ppy".

:-) Magda

Tuesday, November 17, 2009

TRIAL AND ERROR

When I left work today I felt flat. Really flat. Energy levels were rock bottom and I had that awful feeling that I lived with during my comp prep where you drag yourself around in a semi starved state with no energy at all.

So I thought through why I might be feeling this way. I had been out of the office today and had the benefit of movement during the day (some days I'm desk and computer bound and I find that very tiring) so it wasnt that. Then I thought through what I'd eaten over the last couple of days and VOILA!! there it was. I havent eaten enough.

In my quest to eat mindfully and not overeat, I've swung the other way and not had enough and still managed some pretty tough training. So although I had a decent brekkie I missed my 10am skim cappuccino as I was heading out to a site visit. Lunch was bolted down just before 12 as I was famished by then. And it filled me up but didnt keep me full. I had stir fried brocolli with left over lean roast pork, coriander and some flax oil. Yep it looked like comp food and sort of was but funnily enough I like it, its quick to prepare and I havent had the inspiration to be creative with my lunches. I was hungry for a snack in the afternoon and had my usual low fat creamed cottage cheese with cinnamon and Splenda and today I had some mango with it. Was famished for dinner though so the atlantic salmon was devoured with gusto.

Yesterday was light on for lunch as it was leftovers and there wasnt that much of them. I'm better prepared for tomorrow though with brown rice added to my lunch of brocolli, tandoori chicken and coriander.

Trial and error and I'll get it right. Some days you eat more, some you eat less but 2 days of less in a row and I'm not feeling so (physically) good anymore. Thank goodness the fish and salad for dinner was a decent serve and my tummy is happily satisfied and the energy levels have come back up.

:-) M

JUST HAPPY

I have decided to have a wonderful day today. I decided this at 4.50am when my alarm went off and it was time to train upper body. I didn’t even have the split second thought of “oh I don’t want to get up”. I just got up and got into it.

Today I increased some more weights for a really punishing session. Poor triceps don’t get done til near the end and they are so tired by then that its hard to isolate them. I can feel all the surrounding muscles chipping in to help coz the tris are screaming “help us, we cant do this on our own” LOL. I down a small shake straight after and then hit the shower to get ready for work.

On days that I weight train I have a blueberry pancake for breakfast. Its to die for and here’s how I make it.

Beat 2 egg whites with a fork and add approx 60g of low fat creamed cottage cheese and a generous sprinkle of cinnamon. Beat all this together some more. Add ½ punnet of blueberries, 1/3c oats and a generous tablespoon of unprocessed bran. Mix well and then cook in a non-stick pan (in my older pans I use a light spray of oil or in a Scanpan you need nothing). It takes a few minutes each side as I make mine quite thick. I serve it with sugar free maple syrup and a sprinkle of LSA. Try it and tell me what you think.

Its cooler today (well under 35 degrees) so Peter is walking to and from work which means I drop off and pick up our boy. We have the funniest conversations in the car. They are just gold (like how he wants his nana to make a violin cake for his birthday next April LOL). This evening I’ll see my parents when I pick him up from their place and that’ll be nice too.

I got a call today regarding progress on the sh*tty issue in our lives now. We should have something back in writing by the end of the week. I was calm and unemotional during the call and then let it go instead of stewing over it for the rest of the day. I reminded myself that I was choosing to have a wonderful day.

Dinner tonight is Atlantic salmon done on the BBQ with a salad of spinach leaves, roasted pumpkin, semi dried tomatoes, pine nuts and low fat feta. A wine would go nicely with it but I wont indulge until Thursday and I’m ok with that. Its my choice and not a rule dictated to me by some-one else.

When I go to bed tonight I know I’ll be looking forward to getting up tomorrow and nailing my jog/run session and I might even walk to work as a bonus. Happy on the outside. Happy on the inside. Just happy.

M

Monday, November 16, 2009

COULD THIS BE TRUE?

I've now done my 60 minute easy paced jog about 3 times and it is getting easier each time. As I hit the pavement (not literally) I tune into my iPod and slip easily into my "zone". The pace is easy yet today my HRM told me that I had only spent between 1 and 2 minutes in my training zone. The rest of the time my pulse was higher and I burned a whopping 670 calories. It didnt feel that hard, honestly. I think my pulse may have been up due to the heat.

If you'd have said to me a year ago that I would again willingly run for anything more than 30 minutes I would have told you "no bloody way". Doing the City to Bay (12kms) was a huge achievement for me but after completing it I had no desire to repeat it or anything even remotely similar. Yet now I find myself itching to know what distance I cover in 60 minutes (I'm all over the side streets and through the carpark of my local shopping centre) and there is a little voice in my head whispering "enter another event and see how you go".

Hmmm something to ponder during those long zenlike sessions.

:-) Magda

FOCUSSING ON THE GOOD STUFF

Today’s post will just be a boring round up of my fantastic weekend. Sorry I have nothing more inspiring, groundbreaking, spiritually moving or deliciously tantalising to write about.

Saturday started with a mini training session, as time was very short. So it was 20 minutes of leg training incorporating 4 sets of split squats and then 5 sets of stiff legged deadlifts (one of my favourite exercises). I cracked the 40kgs+ on my deadlifts, which I think is a first for me. (Hey you Superwomen who lift heavy shit just stop laughing right now. It was heavy for me LOL). Took my son to swimming and was very proud of him getting an achievement certificate. He is struggling with his swimming, as he is phobic about putting his head underwater so progress is very slow. The afternoon was spent doing domestic stuff both at home and out. More about all that down the track.

On Saturday night we dropped our son to his auntie’s house for a sleep over while we went to the Seal concert at the Enter Centre. Geez he was good. We really enjoyed it. We had dinner out first so we made a night of it sort of like a date (except at the end we went home and went to sleep as we were both so tired LOL).

Sunday started with a sleep-in which is very rare in our household. Peter headed out for a run in the scorching heat while I waited for our boy to be dropped off. Hence there was no training time for me as we wanted to go to the beach and wanted to get away as early as possible. I don’t normally like the beach but I really enjoyed it yesterday. Yes I wore my bikini and felt quite good in it. I even went right in the water which I rarely do as I hate it cold. Then I spent the afternoon lying on my towel under an umbrella and reading the paper while Peter built sand castles with our boy and then romped in the sea with him. We all had ice creams before going home and ending a great day.

Last night we sat outside and had a Corona and a few nibbles before dinner and both commented on what a great weekend it had been and how good we both felt. There may be some sh*t in our lives that we desperately want to get sorted and finalised but we managed to put that aside and focus on all the good stuff that surrounds us as well.

Cheers

Magda

Friday, November 13, 2009

BLESSED WITH A WONDERFUL LIFE

Every second Friday I leave work at 3pm and pick my son up from school. Its my favourite time of the fortnight. I raced to his school today having been caught in traffic due to some city road closures. Luckily he was late getting out so my arriving late didnt matter. He excitedly showed me a microscope he'd bought at the school's Giant Sale and carefully returned the change from his unspent money. The sale was to raise money to send to a poor nation overseas and he commented that the best thing about the sale was that poor people would get money. On the way to the car I asked him if he wanted to go out for coffee and a biscuit or ice cream.

Ice cream won hands down (it was 39 degrees here) so we headed to Cibo at Norwood and indulged in some gelati. Chocolate for my boy and roasted almond for me. He's such a slow eater but today I enjoyed every miunte of watching him slowly lick his icecream til it was finished and he had chocolate smears all over his face :-). Then we chatted about his day before heading back into the city to pick Peter up and head off home.

Such a simple thing yet so incredibly enjoyable. I am so lucky and so blessed to have such a wonderful life. And the weekend is here. Yippee!! And its a hot one. Double yippee!!

M

OH I DO LOVE SUMMER

Check out Kek’s blog for her opinion about the warm (hot) weather we’re having. I’m 110% behind her and couldn’t agree more completely.

Yes the mercury has climbed into the 30s and here in Adelaide it’ll hit the 40s by Sunday and the stream of complaints is already in full swing. “Oh I can’t stand the heat. I wish it’d cool down”. Or people looking for an ally in their quest to hate the heat saying “So how are you liking/handling this heat?” Boy do they get a surprise when I beam from ear to ear and tell them that I (genuinely) love it and it’s about time the cold miserable winter ended and it was HOT. They look at me like I’ve got 3 heads and no brains in any of them. So I go on and I tell them that I hate winter. I hate being cold and this is MY time of year. “You wont find me complaining about the heat,” I tell them and I don’t.

When its hot I love:

Getting out early and running in the warmth wearing shorts and a tank top. When the sweat trickles down my face I know I’m working. Its like I have the proof of my efforts right there.

Wearing open toed sandals and showing off pretty bright pink or dark red toenails (note to self: get that pedicure done NOW).

Wearing sleeveless tops and showing off my nicely toned arms and my broad shoulders. Yes I’m lucky to have a decent set of shoulders with nice width and pretty good muscle tone. Shame that I wasn’t blessed with good thighs to match LOL.

Feeling warm where warm = comfortable = happy.

Balmy evenings. Sitting outside for a drink on a Friday night. Peter cooking dinner on the BBQ. Eating more salad. Eating outside. Chatting away and unwinding.

Having an icy cold Corona with a lime wedge. Just one will do as I’m not normally a beer lover but one on a hot day hits the spot.

Having BBQs with friends or family. I don’t have to cook and I get to eat yummy food that I love.

Being on holidays. Packing lightly. Getting onto a beach or into a pool. Beer-o’clock. Late nights.

Oh I do love summer.

Magda

Thursday, November 12, 2009

CARDIO FREE DAY AND WARDROBE WONDERLAND

Yay today is a cardio free day. Not that I have a problem with cardio. In fact I love it but the old legs will welcome the rest. Yesterday I did my jog/run and walked both to and from work. Mind you in the afternoon my pace couldn’t really count as cardio. It was just too hot to power it up so I kept it moderate and arrived home sane and not too sweaty.

This morning I trained upper body and abs. Increased some of my weights and by the end of the session I could barely hold a 7.5kg dumbbell. How pissweak am I??? LOL. But I’m not stupid enough to think that I need to lift as heavy as some of you other Superwomen. I know it has to be hard for me. And if that’s 10kgs and not 15 or 17 then so be it. I’m mindful of using proper form and I wont ramp up the weights if my form then goes to cr*p.

I’m in a good place emotionally. I’m not letting that issue spoil my mood or drag me down. Sure its annoying but its pushed to the back of my mind for the time being and I’ll worry about it when events unfold further. One of my friends had some good advice about it yesterday and I’m going to take it if the need arises, as I’m sure it will.

And to add further fuel to my happiness fire I now have a much wider range of clothes to enjoy since my weight has come down to a “looking good” level. I bought some white pants in a size 10 after the 2007 comps. I reckon I wore them once before I put on too much weight and couldn’t wear them any more. Well I wore them on Monday and they looked great. Many years ago in Singapore I bought a DKNY red skirt, which looks fantastic. Again its small and I’ve hardly ever worn it. I have it on today. And I even tried on the bikini I bought straight after the 2007 comps. Silly me got all excited that I could fit into a size 8 and bought it when I should have bought the 10 knowing that I’d put on weight. Well I tried the size 8 bikini on and while it feels tight in places, it doesn’t look tight and I’ll be able to wear it this summer. How fanbloodytastic is that??!!

M

Wednesday, November 11, 2009

RAMPING UP THE RUNNING

This morning I set out at 5.15am and did my jog/run training session. It was fantastic. I did at least 10 intervals of running approx 1 minute and sometimes more. The jogs were my rest periods. It was a full on session with my heart rate really getting up and the sweat pouring off me. We are having a major heatwave here (yippee!!) and it took ages for me to cool down.

Then I walked into the Central Market and had breakfast with a couple of friends before going to work. What an excellent start to the day. For brekkie I chose the "raisin sensation". It was a thick slice of toasted raisin bread with ricotta cheese, a poached pear, strawberries, slivered almonds and a light dusting of icing sugar. It came with vanilla syrup which I asked for on the side and didnt end up having. The dish didnt need more sweetness.

So when my diet is mainly clean but unrestricted and I eat what feels right for me and I keep up my training doing stuff I love the result is a feeling of true health, wellbeing and happiness. Why would you choose to live any other way?

M

Tuesday, November 10, 2009

TIRED LEGS

Since moving house my training schedule has changed quite significantly. I no longer do weights 4 x / week as my set up is awkward and also noisy with my son sleeping in the next room. I have reignited my love of running though and am clocking up some decent sessions (well for me anyway). I have now done 2 x one hour runs (well jogs actually) and quite frankly I could go longer at my easy pace but I'm not prepared to get out before 5am. Maybe on a weekend when we're not so busy but not on a work day.

I've also done 2 shorter sessions incorporating 10 x approx 60-70 metre sprints (thats a wild guess as in havent really measured it). I jog to my local shopping centre (about 10 minutes going the long way), do my sprint intervals in the car park and then walk or walk/jog home. All up its about half an hour and a nice change from the long slow paced run earlier in the week.

So my plan now is to introduce a mid length session of about 40 minutes where I incorporate some running intervals. These will be at a running pace (not a slow jog but not my fastest speed either) with the aim of getting my overall speed up on the longer jogs. It'll also provide a bit of interest as two long jogs are a bit draining not just physically but mentally too.

When you couple this with one leg training session of moderate intensity and a few walks to/from work (about 35-40 minutes in duration depending on how hot it is and how fast I push it) its no wonder that I have tired legs. Which I'm hoping will translate into lean and toned legs as I dont know any (serious) runners that have otherwise. Maybe I'll ask Santa for lean and toned legs for Christmas. Please Santa I've been good all year and all I'd like is for my legs to lean down and tone up. Pretty please.

:-) Magda

Monday, November 09, 2009

DEALING WITH HICCUPS

Its been a tough few days and its taking a lot of effort and energy to stay positive and not let things get me down. Sometimes I'm winning and other times I'm not. We are in limbo over a major issue with the ball no longer in our court. Peter hates not being in total control. I dont like it either. So much hinges on this and the "not knowing" is taking its toll. Hopefully it'll all be sorted by the end of this week.

So on Friday I resorted to some bad old habits which at the time made me feel temporarily better even though in the long term they serve no positive purpose. I knew that I made some poor choices and I just accepted that without wallowing in guilt, pity or self hatred. Wasted emotions. Wasted energy. Saturday was a new day and I went back to my new normal habits and had a good day. Followed it up with another good day on Sunday even though I was at a party all day.

I'm feeling good just knowing that I'm eating the way I want to eat MOST of the time and I'm managing it pretty effortlessly. I'm feeling good knowing that despite having a massive "hiccup" (my SP's words) on Friday I got over it and just went back to eating normally the next day without going through all the negative emotions that riddled me previously. I'm feeling good doing exercise that I love and look forward to each day. Oh and the hot weather always makes me feel good. "Bring on the sweat", I say. So when I look at all those things, maybe I dont feel so bad after all. I'll hang onto that thought :-)

Magda

Thursday, November 05, 2009

DANGER WILL ROBINSON DANGER!!

Tonight I have alarm bells sounding as a warning of danger up ahead. Its to do with "the issue" that I've decided to not blog about just yet and just as I thought there are rough seas ahead.

I had a great day today. Felt really good both physically and emotionally and was powering through the work. Then later in the afternoon I had a call about "the issue" and it left me quite worried and a bit upset. Contacted Peter so that we could talk about before we got home where mum and dad were waiting for us. This needed to be discussed in private. All the way to the cafe I was mulling over it but getting nowhere in finding a solution that sat well with me.

At the cafe I ordered a wine (DANGER DANGER!!) and then Peter got there and he had one too. I told him the news. He was so calm and so rational. I love that about him. He deals with major problems all day every day that he is an expert at taking things in his stride. I'm an emotional minefield. When something bad happens I react badly and feel like the world is caving in. I can rarely "fix it" on my own. So its Peter to the rescue. After our chat and his calm reasoning around what we'll do I felt SO much better (of course the glass of red helped as well).

We have a bit of a rough time ahead and all I can say is thank god we have each other. I'm prepared to do the leg work, make calls, sit on hold, find out information etc etc. But I need his support in solving problems, assessing what the options are and deciding on the best course of action. In that sense we make a brilliant team and I feel so lucky to have him as my husband.

My challenge will be to work through this together (not hard) and to stay true to my non-diet way of eating. Yes that means continuing to do the following:

1. Eating mainly lean and clean foods.
2. Eating only when I'm hungry.
3. Never never never stuffing myself over full.
4. Enjoying treats in moderation.

I had some of my old thought patterns sneaking back in today so I'll need to be really mindful of them over the coming days / weeks. I dont want to resort to comfort eating or drinking like I used to but its going to take some effort to stay in the positive groove I've been in lately.

Magda

Wednesday, November 04, 2009

OOOH PAYING THE PRICE NOW

Well after the euphoria of my long run wore off and all the feel good endorphins didnt feel so good any more, I ended up feeling really crappy today. The message was loud and clear:

DO NOT OVEREAT NO MATTER HOW GOOD THE FOOD TASTES.
WINE IS BETTER IN MODERATION - LESS IS MORE.
AND FINALLY, HONOUR YOUR BODY SO IT HONOURS YOU BACK.

I'm sure that the combination of too much food, too much wine and then not enough sleep made for my crappy physical state today. Oh and because I was so tired, I really felt the cold. I couldnt wait to finish work as I just wasnt overly productive in this pathetic state.

So on the walk to my car I thought about this all and realised yet again how important it is to eat well. I hardly ever feel like this anymore because I've been taking much better care of myself. So yesterday was a timely reminder of whats important and how I want to live my life.

Tonight's goal is to get a good night's sleep. Tomorrow morning I'm training upper body and abs and following it up with one of my superb blueberry pancakes. Miss J and I are going to lunch but it'll be low key affair me thinks. Fingers crossed that i wake up feeling as great as I do every other day.

Magda

CRACKING THE 60 MINUTE MARK

This morning I cracked the 60-minute mark for my jog. I’ve wanted to do this for a while now and I often get close at 50 – 55 minutes but never made the 60. So today I made sure I headed out a little bit earlier (5.03am to be exact) and I didn’t have to be back before 6 am so it was 60 minutes or bust.

Although I’m a plodder rather than a runner my goal is always to keep running and not take walk breaks. I must admit the last 10 or 15 minutes were hard and my legs were tired but like I said before, it was 60 or bust today and I was going for it.

My HRM told me that I had burned 550 calories which accounts for ????? aah who cares. I run because I like it (cant believe I’m admitting that now!!) and I like how it makes me feel when I’m finished. Alive. Awake. Vibrant.

We all have Post-Melbourne-Cupitis at work today. The energy levels are low but the stories from yesterday are still flowing. Miss C and I are already planning what we’ll do next year including buying our hats now in the post-Melbourne-Cup sales LOL. I don’t know anybody that had a good win but everybody seemed to enjoy the event this year and I guess that’s what its all about really. Mind you, my body has reminded me that yesterday’s consumption was NOT in my best interest by sending me an annoying little mouth ulcer. I guess that’s the price I pay for overindulging.

So on that note I will sign out and eat my tabbouli with 3-bean mix for lunch. I’m enjoying some vego meals at the moment and this one is a favourite. Although seeing as its quite cold again today I wish I was having hot food. Never mind, I’ll just huddle closer to my heater. And no that’s not a joke.

:-) Magda

Tuesday, November 03, 2009

OOPS. OVERDID IT AT THE MELBOURNE CUP LUNCH TODAY

Today my Assets and Contract Manager and I were invited by one of our service provider contractors to the Advertiser Sunday Mail Foundation (ASMF) Melbourne Cup lunch at Adelaide Oval. Its a huge event and very popular on Adelaide's social calendar. I have never been before and in fact have rarely gotten into the Melbourne Cup thing but was really excited to go this year to such a popular event.

So I lived it up a bit. Lunch was superb and I ate a bit too much. A nice bottle of white wine was parked right in front of me and as I was sitting with a table of gentlemen nobody else touched it so I drank most of it. I had a bet on the race but there was no win coming my way. I didnt really care as I had such a good time. I wore my Christmas Day dress and got lots of compliments for it. It really is very pretty. I did want to take pics before we went but everyone was so busy at work that there was just no chance.

After the lunch I partied on (albeit briefly) with the girls from my office who had all gone to one of the local pubs for their celebrations. Luckily that didnt go on too long as I could have gotten quite untidy LOL.

So how do I feel about today?

Just great.

I have no guilt and no regrets. What I did today, I would do rarely. Life is not a string of perfect behaviours or ideal choices. I havent eaten dinner. Not as punishment but purely because I'm not hungry (mmmm I can still tatse the delicious cheese I had after the meal). Tomorrow I'll probably eat a bit less, again not as punishment but because I wont want or need as much food. There will be no strict dieting or ridiculous training to "make up" for today. And because there is no dreaded weigh in looming I'm not living in fear or dread of what the Metal Monster will say.

So on that note its time to prepare some oats, bran and powder for breakfast tomorrow, get the running gear ready and head off for an early night. I hope you all had a s good a day as me with the exception of a nice win on the geegees.

:-) Magda

Monday, November 02, 2009

A RADICAL DEPARTURE FROM THE NORM

Sometimes you just need to take the pressure off, stop and smell the roses. Sometimes this is what’s needed to achieve what you’ve always wanted.

As a radical departure from the norm, what would your life be like if you stopped setting challenging weight loss goals and then doing everything in your power to achieve them?

If experience shows that when you place yourself under so much stress and pressure, the slightest inkling of failure has you spiralling in the opposite direction, why not contemplate a different approach?

If you lose control and lose the plot and before you know it you’ve spiralled to the depths of despair, could there be a better way to get what you always wanted? What if your reaction to those negative behaviours is to then beat yourself up, put yourself down, punish yourself with even stricter dieting, more cardio, doing whatever you can to rid your body of those dreaded excesses? Ask yourself would you treat your daughter or best friend that way? No, then maybe there is a better way.

Relax. Enjoy your food. Eat lean and clean food most of the time because you like it and it makes you feel good. Savour your treats and never deny yourself if a treat is what you really want. Accept that on some days you’ll eat more and on others you’ll eat less. It will balance out. Enjoy social occasions without being a stick in the mud because the food on offer isn’t on your diet plan. But on the other hand never never never stuff yourself silly. You don’t need to. Nothing is banned and you can have it again any time you wish. Eat til you’re pleasantly satisfied. Its ok to leave food on your plate. The angels will appreciate it.

Exercise because you love it and you love how it makes you feel. If you miss a day that’s ok. There is no rule that says that missing a day’s training is sacrilege. It doesn’t make you a bad, lazy or unmotivated person. Do what you love. If you’re a cardio queen then enjoy your hot, sweaty heart-thumping sessions. If you’re a weights girl then get under some heavy shit, lift and grunt. Love what you do. Aim for some balance.

And finally, accept yourself, love yourself and give thanks daily for the great life you have. When the glass is half full a smile will easily appear on your face. Leave the frowning for the Negative Nellys.

I took the risk and changed my approach to this whole dieting business. I ditched it and started to really enjoy life. I met with my Metal Monster on Saturday morning and was rewarded with a nice drop and am sitting about 2kgs off my ultimate maintenance weight. But the number aside, its how I feel now that has seen the biggest change.

Would you take a similar risk if you too were fed up with the whole diet mentality and all the negativity it brings with it?


Magda

Thursday, October 29, 2009

SPRINTING AND TUTUS

This morning I contemplated having a brief interlude with my Metal Monster. The poor darling has been severely neglected since the beginning of October. So much so that he's gathered a good layer of dust (tsk tsk says something about my cleaning standards) and he's looking ....forlorn. And lonely. And unloved.

Then I walked away and thought "you can wait. I dont really care what number you throw at me today". And I had my big hot lemon drink, put on my gym gear and hit the weights.

Now if thats not progress then I'll sprint the length of Rundle Mall in a tutu. Hmmm that makes me think that some sprints might be in order tomorrow morning. The steady state jogging is great but there needs to be some variety to my cardio. But I'll stick to my gym pants and T shirt and keep the tutu for a special occassion.

M

FEELING FANTASTIC

Today I feel fantastic. Really fantastic. I mean FANTASTIC!!!

It could be because I woke up to the smell of my superbly concocted chicken recipe cooking in the slow cooker.

It may be because I did an absolutely cracking upper body workout and really pushed it HARD.

It could even be the best oat, egg white, cottage cheese, bran, cinnamon and blueberry pancake with SF maple syrup and a sprinkle of LSA that I had for breakfast.

Or maybe it was fitting into a pair of size 10 pants that I was wearing close to comp time 2 years ago and then getting a “you’re looking very svelte” compliment at work.

Or the walk to work where I got a great pace going and lapped up the warmth of this beautiful day.

Of course knocking off a big ugly job at work could have contributed.

But it’s probably a combination of all of the above. It’s been like a morning of wins and add them all up and I’m in my very happy place.

For lunch today Miss J and I went to the Manna Café and I had one of the best salt and pepper calamaris ever. Oh and a glass of sav blanc and a good chin wag. Good food + Good wine + Good friends = Happy Magda.

If I died now, it’d be with a big smile on my face.

:-) Magda

Wednesday, October 28, 2009

NO NEWS YET .... SORRY


Ahoy me hearties. The Cautious Cathy side of me is keeping mum until our sailing ship clears these potentially rough seas around the harbour. Once we have left the port and are sailing on calmer seas, I'll share my news. Just feel better taking this care right now.


Above is a pic (sorry about the poor quality) of my haircut and colour thanks to the lovely Miss B


who never disappoints when it comes to styling my tresses. Whilst Peter was happy to dish out a compliment about my hair, he grizzled when asked to take the pic. How will I ever get photographic evidence of me fitting into my skinny jeans and looking so hot LOL.

I'm slowly establishing a training routine that will meet my needs and keep me happy. I think it'll look like this:

Monday: 45-50 minute jog
Tuesday: lower body + abs
Wednesday: 45-50 minute jog
Thursday: upper body + abs
Friday: 30 min jog
Saturday: lower body + abs + exercise bike intervals (time permitting)
Sunday: free choice (probably be a long walk or walk/jog combo)
Then the following week the weights will be: upper / lower / upper and rotate them like so. There will also be some walks to / from work which will add a bit more moderate intensity cardio but Peter and I will work out our walking schedule from week to week for now.

Nutrition all good and am planning to do a weigh and measure around Oct end / Nov beginning for curiosity's sake. Yeah I know I dont weigh myself anymore etc but a girl is entitled to change her mind when it suits her (which is definitely no more than once a month).

Cheers all

Magda

Tuesday, October 27, 2009

A NEW JOURNEY

We have taken the plunge and done it.

We are about to embark on a new journey in a new direction.

As captains of our ship we have changed our sailing destination and are heading to a different port. Our journey is not yet mapped out and there may well be rough seas along the way but there will be no stopping us until we reach our new dream.

Swift action was required before the ship set sail for its original destination. Once it had done that changing course would not be an option without major grief. The future is somewhat uncertain but that brings with it a level of excitement too. Excitement at the potential of what it could bring.

I’m happy to say that we both listened to our hearts, which were both in sync, and we are confident that our decision albeit made quickly, was the right one.

Magda

Monday, October 26, 2009

MONDAYITIS

Mondayitis has a strong hold on me today. Does anybody else feel like that? I've been chipping away at a big task today and have broken the back of it but now its time for the write up I find that I cant string a coherent sentence together. My seven year old could write it up better than me, I'm sure. Well at least its not long til I race off to pick him up from After School Care.

I hate feeling like this because although I'm not hungry my mind continually wanders to food as the ultimate distraction or excuse to take a break from my work. I've still managed to eat only when I'm hungry but am realising that boredom or just not being into the job at hand will have me toying with eating when I dont need to and in fact I dont really want to eat. Oh to be able to pack up my desk, pick up my son, head out for a coffee and a chat with him before going home and just getting stuck into domestic bliss. I dont want for much to be totally happy LOL.

As October draws to an end this coming weekend I marvel at how quickly it came and went and how significantly my life changed as my residence changed. I'm so proud that I held it all together and didnt let the many disappointments and challenges of finding a nice rental in a good area, get the better of me. There was no Binge Monster screaming at me to eat junk, eat lots of junk and no Lazy Lucy convincing me to blow off my training. They dont really feature in my life anymore and that makes for a much happier existence.

But I'm not so smug and complacent to think that they'll never be there. Lets just say I'm forever mindful of where I've come from and how much I dont want to go back there. Except this time I'll stay where I am and move to an even better and stronger place by loving myself as I am right now, accepting who I am, believing in myself and genuinely wanting to nurture myself with what I know I need instead of enforcing a rigid diet and training schedule and relying on willpower of steal to see me through. That recipe just doesnt work for me and I've finally realised it and accepted it.

Now to just get the melting pot of other issues sorted and know the direction we go from here. Whilst I know I can handle this, it would be nice to not have the uncertainty hanging over our heads.

Cheers all

Magda

Sunday, October 25, 2009

EMINENT TURMOIL

Just when you think that you have all your little ducks lined up in a neat row and there is order, direction and certainty in your life BANG one innocent decision and subsequent action can bring all that tumbling down. I didnt think that I could or would feel or think what I am right now but my gut feel is that there is another big change on the horizon. Watch this space.

Sorry the hot bod pics are yet to come. In fact are yet to be taken. Not much opportunity over the last few days. We all headed to the zoo today but was seriously rugged up as the weather turned cold again. Yet again...watch this space.

We had a housewarming for a very small group of our closest friends last night. It was a great night. Peter cooked a lovely BBQ and we drank heaps of wine and hoed into a cheesecake for dessert. And the skinny jeans still fit this morning :-). In fact I scored well on the compliments last night as both my girlfriends have recently gained weight and neither is looking or feeling their best whereas I was flying on cloud 9.

I managed close to an hour of cardio on Saturday morning but nothing today as there was cleaning up to do before we headed out for the day. I am due for a decent session at 5am tomorrow though. And I get to walk to and from work on Thursday with Peter doing it on most of the other days (in his words he needs it more than me LOL).

So with all things considered and despite the eminent turmoil, I'm feeling really happy within myself. I continue to believe that I'm getting this intuitive eating right, that I am getting leaner and that I am a confident, capable and successful person. I dont need to stuff myself to make myself feel better when the going gets tough. I dont want to overload my body with tons of crappy food or too much alcohol. I am finally truly happy and at peace within myself.

Magda

Thursday, October 22, 2009

MY NEW LIFESTYLE

We are settling into a different lifestyle in our rented cottage which is just 3kms from the CBD where we both work and just under 5kms from our son’s school. We are no longer rattling around in a massive house with way too many rooms that take hours to clean properly. Yes cleaning our neat little shoebox will be a non event LOL. I’m not usually a lover of old homes but I have taken to this one with quite a passion. We are walking distance to a really nice shopping centre with 2 awesome supermarkets and some great shops. There is a family café/restaurant across the road from the shopping centre and further along the main road there are numerous restaurants, cafes and some interesting shops all within walking distance. I’d give our location a firm 10 / 10.

Today I walked to work and it took a little over 30 minutes. I know that hubbie and I will be fighting over who walks and who drives our son to school as we both love walking. Bring on the incidental cardio exercise on top of my usual 5am sessions. The walk home took me 38 minutes as I spent quite some time waiting to cross at city intersections but on the straight runs through I was really powering along. Tomorrow or the next time I do the walk I'll use my HRM to see how it rates on the cardio scale.

However Hilde has reminded me to keep up my running (well my Cliff Young Shuffling as what I do cant possibly be called running LOL). I must confess that I had secretly slipped back into my happy comfort zone where I walk one song and then jog one. But running will be back on the agenda forthwith!! She has also come up with a really good 2 day split and I'll be starting it next week. Just basic upper + abs and then lower + abs which is what I want right now. Maybe down the track I'll venture back to more weights but right now this will keep me training and happy.

So as you can tell I'm pretty happy with life right now. I love to live in such a way that I experience lots of different things and I try not to shy away from new ventures and adventures. Hubbie is pretty much the same. And our living situation ticks all those boxes for both of us so I have no regrets about coming here.

Finally I will post proof of my "hotness" (LMAO) when I get a pic of me in a my skinny jeans and post it up as evidence of my recent achievement. Watch this space.

Magda

Wednesday, October 21, 2009

YOOHOO .... I'M BACK

OMG what a week its been!!

The move went well although that can only be said in hindsight. There were some hairy moments like when the guys were still loading up after 1pm and I was calculating the finish time to be around 7 or 8pm. It was more like 6pm but still a very long day. Then there was the drama of getting our massive washing machine through a 700mm doorway. There was a hair's breadth to spare on either side but it went in. No room for my dryer though.

Hubbie got home and I could just tell what he was thinking and it wasnt anything good. He hadnt seen the house as he was sick when I inspected it so he had to trust my judgement. Oh and he didnt dare make a disparaging comment as he knew how bloody hard it was to get a nice place in a good area.

On a happy note though, by Sunday afternoon we had 99% unpacked and made the place look and feel homely and cosy (it is very small compared to our last house). We started to relax and enjoy the fruits of our labour and even had my parents around for a BBQ so that mum could see where we were and indulge us with nice comments about our new home.

I started the week on a training course so my evenings were spent catching up on urgent work issues hence my extended lack of blogging. I'm happy to be back and have caught up with most blogs since my absence. I plan to be on regularly from now on :-)

So on the nutrition and training front all has been good. I missed 2 days of training right after moving day as I had higher priorities like unpacking. By Sunday I was back into it but I do have the massive challenge of no longer having a dedicated training room. Yep that room now also doubles as our study and getting to some of the equipment is tedious and awkward. So I'm looking to streamline my weight training down to the "bare essentials". Two sessions if possible, large muscle groups, supersetting and working within my space restrictions. I'm determined to make it work though! Cardio need not suffer while I can get out for a combination of walks / walk/jogs and jogging.

My "no diet" approach continues to work well for me. On some days I eat more and on others less so it all balances out just like normal life when you are not a slave to a formula or strict plan. But dont get me wrong, I still choose healthy foods most of the time and watch my portions but giving myself eating freedom has helped me to lose my "gorge now, diet later mentality". And I continue to feel great both physically and mentally and thats what really matters to me.

Finally I've saved the best til last as it almost deserves a post all of its own but I'm too excited to not share it now....

THIS MORNING I FITTED INTO MY SIZE 11 SKINNY JEANS AND I LOOKED AND FELT FANTASTIC :-)

Magda

Wednesday, October 14, 2009

GOING OFF LINE ......

....til we're all moved in and settled.

Tonight the computers and beds all get taken apart. Its moving day tomorrow.

I have completed 4 weights sessions this week to the best of my ability with an exercise room in total disarray. I plan to walk early tomorrow before the removalists arrive. I plan to be in good spirits for the day. Somebody needs to be. Hubbie is stressed to the eyeballs and he'll be AT WORK for it all.

See you all soon from my new address.

Magda

Tuesday, October 13, 2009

SAYING GOOD BYE TO THE METAL MONSTER

The thing I love the most about my "no diet" approach is the "no weighing on the Metal Monster or taking measurements" that goes with it. This is so liberating and its like a huge burden has been lifted from my shoulders. Let me explain.

I have never done the daily weighing thing. I just dont see the point. And when your system is slow and it might be every three days that things move, whats the point of daily weighing? At the most I'd weigh after "the move" or take it down to weekly but time it for "after the move".

So as a weigh-in approached I'd start to get anxious about it. If I'd been meticulously following my diet plan and training hard then I'd expect a really good loss on the scales. It was my right to have that and I absolutely expected it. So what if it didnt happen? Yep me being a big sooky lala would get all upset and at best I'd have a shitty day of being in a bad mood. At worst I'd eat my body weight in junk food because thats what I did. Hmmm that made for happy and calm Magda .... NOT!!!!

But if I hadnt been so good then I'd be fretting about what I'd eaten, what effect would it have, surely it wouldnt be too bad etc etc. There was no peace in my head and I'd step on the scales in trepidation dreading the number that would be thrown up at me because it would determine what sort of day I'd have.

The other scenario was the evening before the weigh-in would be one of watching everything I ate making sure it wasnt too much, too salty, too high in carbs etc. If I kept my portion quite small and limited it to protein and green veg then the scales often dipped unrealistically lower, lifting my mood higher. But a week later they'd even out and I'd be down in the dumps again.

So many shitty scenarios playing with my head, causing me anxiety and unhappiness. I tell you, over the years I could not form a happy friendship with that damned Metal Monster no matter what.

So I've let it go and I dont weigh myself now. I'm no longer regularly anxious or stressed or riding an emotional roller coaster. I judge my progress by how I look and feel and how my clothes fit. I've lived in this body for 46+ years and if I dont know it by now then when will I know it? Its time to listen, look , feel and trust my instincts and believe that I'll achieve the lean and toned body I desire and love the process of doing so.

:-) Magda

Monday, October 12, 2009

WHAT MY DAY CONSISTED OF

Well this morning I trained in my mess of an exercise room. It would have been so easy to just blow it off because I wasnt perfectly set up but I quickly talked myself out of that and set myself the challenge of devising an effective leg workout with what I had. So here's how it went:

1. Warm up on the exercise bike and prehabs using fitball and light leg extensions.
2. Squats with a 10kg plate - this was a light - moderate intensity for me and I rarely do them for that reason.
3. Stiff legged deadlifts. Because I didnt have my full range of weight plates these ended up being heavier than usual so I made up for the easy work on the squats (different muscle group I know but good to work HARD).
4. Split squats using the embarassingly light (2kg) dumbbells. OK I have glutes that are as weak as ***** so even with this piddly weight I'm working hard and I get very sore after. With a few of these under my belt over the weeks the weight will go up but not by a lot. Basically these kill me and I have a true love / hate with them.
5. Then to finish I supersetted leg extensions with hamstring curls just adjusting the weight by 5kgs between the two exercises.

Not bad considering my limitations. Then it was onto the bike for my 15 intervals of 30 secs each and then some steady state riding til the clock ticked 6am and I was all done. Happy. Happy.

So just to bore you all further today's meals were:

Breakfast: Protein/oat pancake with blueberries (cooked into it), sugar free maple syrup and a light sprinkle of LSA. Mug of white tea (no added milk)
On the way to work: skim cappuccino
Lunch: left-over tofu stir fry with some leftover fillet steak sliced into it
Afternoon snack (didnt have this in the morning as I just wasnt hungry): brown rice, thinly sliced cabbage and a tin of spicy chilli tuna
Dinner: tofu stir fry (different batch with different sauce).
During the day I drink several large mugs of hot water with lemon slices in it. Its delicious and keeps my water intake right up when I just dont feel like downing glass after glass of water in this cold weather.

Three more nights in our current house and then its moving day. Counting down now.

Cheers all

Magda

Sunday, October 11, 2009

I MUST BE DOING SOMETHING RIGHT

We have spent the weekend attacking our packing with a vengeance. There are boxes everywhere, the place is a huge mess and we're well on the way to being ready for our Thursday move. We are so ready in fact that my super efficient hubbie has taken my rack to pieces which I was warned about so I made sure I got chest and back done this morning. What I didnt know is that he also packed away our set of free weights and dumbbells :-( Yep all gone back in the box and nowhere to be found. So I have 3 sessions to do this week : legs, abs and shoulders/arms. And I have the following equipment: Olympic barbell (weighing 10kgs) + standard barbell, 2 x 10kg plates, 4 x 5kg plates, 1 set of dumbbells @ approx 10kgs (not adjustable), 1 set of dumbbells @ 2kgs, push-up handles, Bosu and fitball and if I move a heap of stuff I can get to my adjustable bench. So this week I have to put on my "resourcefull PT" hat and come up with some improvised sessions for the above.

Food has been just great and I'm feeling good both physically and emotionally. Each day I'm balancing my nutritional needs and wants and eating a wider variety of foods than I was a few weeks ago. I've also ditched the old "eat every 3 hours rule" and I listen to my body and hunger signals and eat when I'm hungry and not when the clock says I should. In fact when I have a later breakfast as I often do on the weekend, I'm usually satisfied with 3 square meals and not 5.

Its also great to have the pressure of "forbidden foods" taken away. Because I allow myself to have what I want there is no judging food as to whether its good or bad or if I'm good or bad because I've chosen to eat it. We had dinner at my bestie's last night and she had made a cheesecake for dessert. Normally I'd be horrified and although I'd have it so as to not be rude and then chastise myself for being weak, now I enjoy it with gusto and there is no guilt or shame or beating myself up afterwards. Life is too short to not enjoy cheesecake with your friends every now and then.

So to cap off a very tiring but pretty good few days I'll just share 2 great things that happened to me within 2 days of each other. Two people told me I had lost weight. One's comments were "you're wasting away (well not quite but I know what she meant) and the other was "wow you've lost weight, you're much slimmer through here (pointing to her hips)". I smiled from ear to ear and just said "thank you". I must be doing something right.

Magda

Friday, October 09, 2009

THE DARKER SIDE OF MY DIET HISTORY

In the back of my mind today I've been deliberating over whether to post this or not. If I thought I was at risk of continuing or reverting to any of these behaviours then I gues I wouldnt talk about them but because I feel free of them now I feel ok about writing about them. Not sure what it'll achieve but here goes. Some of its a bit gross so feel free to exit now if you wish.

I have never been anorexic as I love food too much and could not imagine not eating to that extent. Yes there have been periods where I havent eaten much but I was still a long way from being anorexic.

Bulimia is another issue though. When binge eating becomes a regular feature in your life, yet you so desperately want to be thin, you go to almost any length to achieve your goal despite everything you do to sabotage yourself along the way. I can recall many instances where I had binged to the point of feeling like I was going to burst and then trying to make myself vomit. It never worked. But I tried it many times. But as for laxatives well that was another story. Down the hatch, a double dose for good measure and just wait for the unavoidable outcome. Aaah bliss, all the badness from the binge was undone in one (or maybe several) fowl swoop. Problem instantly solved and therefore a pattern that was repeated over and over again. I have paid the price dearly as I have the slowest system on earth and have even had a colonoscopy to make sure everything was ok down there and whilst its not 100% I should be ok. Aaah the stupid things we do when we are young and foolish.

Which leads me to my many "I'll just not eat diets". Oh I've lost track of how many times I got on that bandwagon. I even recall an appointment with my very sympathetic and understanding GP who in my teens could see my struggles. I remember him saying to me one day "even if you dont want to eat, just have a couple of Ryvitas. They'll give you energy and they have no fat and are actually good for you". Good advice under the circumstances. But I cant remember if I took it. I spent a lot of time not eating.

Then I spent time not eating fat and then not eating carbs. Low fat sucks. No carbs sucks even more. My brain stops working. No kidding. Its not just fuzzy. Its not functional full stop. I can manage on quite low carbs but there comes a point which I cannot go below and quite frankly I wont again.

I'm so lucky that somewhere along the way I found exercise that I enjoy. Aerobics was great for me and it eventually led me to weight training which I know is the bees knees. But I'm a cardio junkie at heart and always will be. I do make sure that I balance the two most of the time.

As for my eating, well it might not be great but you can see that I've come a long way. The best thing is that I know where I want to go and I feel positive about the decision I've made about the path I want to travel. I may not always know the best way to get there but I'll keep trying things until I find it.

You know when I see all that written down I think "wow you made things hard for yourself, didnt you?" but I guess thats what you get when you get caught up in body image issues at a very young age, low self esteem, lack of knowledge about good nutrition, no desire to be active and family pressure to eat up and enjoy your food. I guess we all have challenges to overcome, its just that some dont have the knowledge and skills to deal with them as well as others.

M

Thursday, October 08, 2009

MY DIET HISTORY

Reading Shelley's blog about diets not working (sorry cant link to it) brought back a flood of memories of my diet history. It started when I was in year 6 at school and already a bigish girl. We were doing gymnastics in PE and I jumped onto the ??? horse (cant even remember its correct name) and broke it. If that wasnt embarassing enough my slim, young, blonde and very attractive teacher made fun of me with a comment about having to diet and the seed was planted.

My first attempts at dieting were to drink big glasses of water before meals so I wouldnt eat as much. At a very young age (probably under 14) my mum took me to my first diet clinic and I was on a diet as such. I remember eating my prescribed meal for lunch and being hungry an hour later (I was a growing girl with a good apetite). I couldnt stick to it and I lost no weight (maybe even gained some) and was chastised when I had my weekly weigh ins.

My problem was that I was a great eater with a healthy appetite but I did no sport and was quite inactive. I have very poor hand eye coordination and was just basically not good any sports. My parents didnt nurture or encourage me in any so any semblance of weight management was going to be an uphill battle.

My teens were a struggle of losing a bit of weight and then regaining it but I cant remember how I did it. All I know is that I knew jack shit about good nutrition or the importance of exercise. Being in a European family where poverty had been well known, eating heartily and being a bit overweight was highly desired. Thin was definitely NOT in.

In my early 20s I joined Weight Watchers for the first time back in the days when their program was very basic and you ate a certain number of serves of the various food groups. Ironically the simplicity of this diet meant it was pretty clean as there was no scope of extra processed crap. Needless to say I lost a decent amount of weight but never hung around to learn maintenence so it always came back.

I have been on a diet just about every day of my life bar a few instances such as post comp (but by 4 weeks later I was trying to lose weight again) and that small window between giving up a diet and then finding all the weight coming back with a vengeance. In my uneducated days I believed the following at different times:

1. Meat was fattening so I would eat vegetarian quiche.
2. Anything low fat could be eaten in any quantity I desired. Hence low fat muffins and biscuits became my best friends.
3. Sugar was nowhere near as bad as fat.
4. Fruit juice was better than soft drink so I drank heaps of it.
5. Starving on one meal a day was the ultimate diet.

When you read that now you wonder what chance I had of ever getting lean and maintaining it. But I discovered aerobics and fell in love with it and at least I had movement in my life on a regular basis as I taught it from my mid 20s until this year. I also tried weight training back then but just couldnt warm to it.

So over the years I think I did Weight Watchers about 3 times, the Israeli Army Diet, the soup diet, the body wraps that sweat your fat off, the go to the gym and use the vibrating belt for exercise, the Magda diet, the whatever else I could get my hands on to try, give up, yoyo and be forever frustrated and unhappy with myself. One time in my 20s I managed to get my weight under 60kgs and have some scary photos of me in a size 8 dress looking almost skeletal. Gee I thought I was shit hot then.

So fast forward to more recent times. I now know so much more not just about food but about the psychology of diets. I've done it tough on a comp prep diet and got my body fat down to 12%. Not something that I could or would even want to maintain. But in the process I've also taught myself about clean eating and learnt what works for me both on the physical level and on the emotional one as well. One benefit of getting older is getting wiser (there arent many I can tell you LOL) and then waking up to the fact that there has to be a better way.

A way where there is freedom to enjoy the food you love without guilt or shame.
A way where you listen to your body and feed it when it needs it, not when the clock strikes 3 and its time to eat.
A way where every waking moment is not spent anticipating what the scales will say at the next weigh in and then having that number determine what sort of day you have.
A way where life is lived and not spent weighing, measuring, preparing, portioning, logging and analysing every morsel that passes your lips.
A way of life that promotes calmness and internal happiness.

Whats your diet history? I'd love to know.

:-) Magda

Wednesday, October 07, 2009

ANOTHER WORRY CLOUD DEALT WITH AND THE STEEP LEARNING CURVE

ANOTHER WORRY CLOUD

Well I spoke too soon as I had the worst night's sleep last night worrying about the move and planning out the logistics of it. I was still awake well after 11pm (way too late for me) and then at 3am hubbie's phone blipped, woke me up and that was it. No more sleep. I got up before 5, did my abs workout then did bike intervals 30 sec / 30 sec and then just kept riding for a total of about an hour. Time well spent under the circumstances me thinks. Today I booked the removalist and I know the procedure for picking up keys so maybe now that worry cloud will lift and let me get a good rest.

THE STEEP LEARNING CURVE

I continue to learn new things daily on my "no diet" journey but seeing its still early days, I guess the learning curve is rightly steep. When you have the freedom to eat what you want and life is not an endless string of diet meals you may not always be hungry at the 3 hour mark and you may not always need 5 meals a day.

I found this to be the case today. I'm a hungry person in the mornings and that 10am snack is VERY welcome but after lunch I lost my way a little. I tend to munch on sugar free lollies a bit after lunch and because I had been chomping my way through a few today I wasnt overly hungry for my cottage cheese and pear (yep diet food but I love them). But I thought ahead to that time between 5 and 6pm when I'd be starving if I didnt eat then and I ate the pear and cottage cheese. So dinner time rolled around and I wasnt hungry. I dawdled through making myself a tofu stir fry and then heated up left over pasta for hubbie. I was just starting to get a little hungry when it was done but in hindshight I could easily have waited another hour to eat. So lesson learned today is that I wont need 5 meals every day. If I'm not really hungry then I shouldnt be eating "because its time". I kept my dinner to a pretty small serve as I didnt need lots of food and will be a bit more mindful, in future.

Tomorrow is lunch with my friend and work colleague Miss J and we'll be having a champagne to celebrate my new home and I wont be stressing about what I can and cant eat. Thats one of the things I love about "no diets".

:-) Magda

Tuesday, October 06, 2009

A HUGE WEIGHT HAS BEEN LIFTED FROM MY SHOULDERS .....

.... as we now have a place to live next week. Yes after scouring the rental market and kissing some frogs (the words of one of the Property Managers I met) we have been accepted for a charming little cottage with loads of character located about 3 kms from the CBD in a leafy no through road and walking distance to one of Adelaide's trendiest cafe and shopping precincts. Thank you God for not making me have to live in a dump as I was starting to fear at one stage.

Moving day is next Thursday and there is some major organising to do pretty quickly but I'm ok with that. Its the uncertainty of not knowing where home will be that causes me the most grief. In fact today I had a good dose of nervous runs as I waited for a verdict which came through latish tonight. At least I dont feel bloated LOL.

I'm embracing this "no diet" way of life but today's lunch wasnt the best choice. We cooked tandoori chicken on the Webber last night. Yummo. I made a salad with it for lunch today but it was a really cold day and I find salads disapppointing on cold days. Made up with a yummy dinner though. Peppered calamari with salad of spinach leaves, roast pumpkin, semi dried tomato, feta and pine nuts. Tummy was happy after that :-) So you win some, you lose some but its early days so its still very much a learning process. Oh and as for how much to eat. Yep lots of learning to do there. I'm usually ok with portions if I've made it and served it out but eating out is my biggest challenge. Or rather a mentality that says "my that tastes so good that I dont want to leave any of it". So will need to work on my thoughts around those situations when they arise.

Cheers for now and here's to a great week with no big cloud of uncertainty hanging over me any more.

:-) Magda