Friday, August 31, 2007


So here I am in all my white-as-a-ghost-glory. This is my "relaxed pose" ... cool hey?? I'm pretty happy with my upper body but goodness the legs need SOOO much more work. Weight is sitting a smidge over 57kgs and the scales are playing "lets tease Magda" but I'm not getting sucked in as I know what this game involves and I will not succumb to the "power of the numbers" LOL!!

Today I had another posing coaching session and M taught me the first half of my routine which I know I'm going to love. It feels so good and looks great when M does it :-) I know I have heaps of practice to do so I'll be trying to devote time to that (as well!!) every day.

The lurgies have all but "left the building" YAY and tomorrow I'll be back into the more hardcore stuff. I tell you I have a really strong constitution. WH and BS have both been sick more than once this season and each one of them far worse than I've just been. I thank God (and my parents) every day that they made me so strong and resilient.

So just keeping it brief tonight and powering on as one needs to do.

G'night all


Thursday, August 30, 2007


Is how I feel right now. Diet is 100% on track (its gotta be!!). I had every intention of doing cardio last night...even told WH that I'd be doing a "light" bike ride (he was appalled)...but commonsense prevailed and with my energy levels so low I just thought "whats the point". In all honesty I believed that rest was best last night so I took myself off to bed early to try to shake these lurgies.

Well today I'm still not AOK but I dont feel as crappy as I did yesterday. I managed a longer moderate intensity cardio session this morning and I'm happy with that. I'm consciously taking things easier so I recover quickly and can get back into the more serious training thats required at 5 weeks out.

So not much else to report from this neck of the woods. Thanks to the lovely ladies who have left words of support and encouragement YET AGAIN. I may not be 100% physically but at least my head is in the right place...and that counts for a lot right now :-)

Cheers all


Wednesday, August 29, 2007


So what’s bad?

My throat is sore. My nose is runny. My head feels “thick” and yucky. I’m more tired than usual and I’m really feeling cold. I guess the germs are trying their hardest to topple me.

But there is good too.

This morning I hit 57kgs so if I keep starving (oops dieting for comp) I should easily achieve my goal of being under 57 by some time on the weekend. I’m still training and this morning I did my last weights session for the week – shoulders/bis/calves and I threw in some oblique work as well. It wasn’t one of my better sessions by far but in light of how I’m feeling, I was still pleased with it. Eating is 100% on track so at least I’m not stressing about falling off the wagon and having to get back on it.

Did a bit more posing too and gosh that’s so tiring as well. I keep forgetting to flex my legs so a lot more practice is in order. I have my next coaching session on Friday afternoon. I hope M notices that my weight is down and I’m looking more like I’m fit to compete in under 6 weeks time.

So last night I was chained to the cooktop doing even more… guessed it….food prep. Gosh where does all that food go as I’m the only one eating it? But then if you consider how many small meals you have in a day, it actually adds up to quite a bit…it just never feels like it LOL!!!

So that’s my life right now. Not feeling 100% but doing the best I can to keep my prep on track.

Cheers all

Tuesday, August 28, 2007


Despite not sleeping enough last night.
Despite having a sore throat.
Despite feeling cold and hungry today.

Did anyone check out the moon last night and this morning? I love a full moon as it always has a very significant effect on my moods and this one certainly has brought the happy and positive vibes I need right now. And lets not forget the full lunar eclipse due tonight. I’ll be out there taking it all in, sucking in more of those positive and happy vibes.

Last night I bit the bullet and got in some much needed posing practice. I quite enjoyed it actually. It must be the natural “show-off” in me. Like the fabric I’ve picked for my bikini. It screams “LOOK AT ME!!!!!” I might not have the best physique on comp day but I wont go unnoticed LOL!!

I also did a light cardio session last night (yes the 2nd one for the day) despite feeling quite tired and “not feeling like it”. Then this morning I did an excellent session. As my throat was sore and I was unable to sleep, I decided to ditch the high intensity sprints and go for moderate intensity/longer time. I set out at 4.58am and jogged for 52mins (no breaks!!). I’ll check the distance tonight but I reckon it was 7-8kms. My average heart rate was 139bpm and at that level of intensity I feel as though I could go forever. Then a bit of ab work and I was feeling fantastic (except for the sore throat).

So I’m clocking up little wins which all add up to a (hopefully) big win in under 6 weeks time. Just stuff like:

Having a peppermint tea instead of a skim cappuccino when out with WH this morning.
Placing all of BS’s French toast crusts in the bin and not eating them (they are so delicious I tell you)
Staying right away from the nibbles, roasted veges, yorky puddings and dessert last Saturday night …. Actually that’s a BIG win!!
And just getting on with it all.

Now I just need the sore throat to take hike and all will be 100%.



Monday, August 27, 2007


My focus and determination has been improving steadily since Saturday. My diet has been 100% clean and on track. Weight training is going well although my lower back is bordering on serious problems. However I can manage it by being extra careful with the exercises which affect it, reducing some of my training volume and intensity and the main thing is to stay POSITIVE and HAPPY. I’ve had some awesome cardio sessions too. Yesterday I did my 5km route but did sprint intervals. I didn’t reduce my time (I didn’t really expect to) but my average heart rate was 156bpm and my max was 168bpm. These are seriously high readings but I felt ok (well as ok as you can feel when you’re working around 90% of your max heart rate). Just shows how much my fitness has improved.

Mind you an hour after that run (and it was only about 30 mins long) I felt REALLY tired. I was changing the sheets on our bed and I felt seriously tempted to just curl up and have a sleep.

I did quite a bit of food prep over the weekend and that always makes me feel organised and on top of things. I love having a fridge full of veges which miraculously turns into my meals in their storage containers LOL!! No seriously, I quite enjoy cooking for myself knowing that my meals are giving me just what I need and nothing I don’t need.

Its Monday morning and I’m already ahead with this week’s training. I did my once a week gym session today and I took some licence and veered from Josh’s program. I’m a bit disillusioned with my back work/development so to keep myself motivated, I changed my program. That way I was looking forward to the session instead of approaching it with dread and hatred. I still worked really hard but also enjoyed the change.


I’ve set myself a mini goal to get my weight under 57kgs by this weekend. I’ve had a huge psychological struggle with getting under this weight. This is one of the reasons my eating has been all over the place for a few weeks. However I now feel confident that my heads in the right place and the drop will happen. That will be another very significant milestone for me and will help me feel even more confident that I’ll make it to the stage and be happy with how I look on the day.

Wish me luck….NO its not luck which will make this happen, its my efforts. My success is up to me and I’m grasping it with both hands.


Friday, August 24, 2007


Well folks CRUNCH TIME is here. This is the time I have identified where everything I do matters and there is no room for stuffing around. Harsh I know but very true if I'm to reach my goal and be happy with how I look on comp day.

OMG the last couple of weeks have certainly been rocky and I havent been focussed and dedicated to achieving my goals. But thats in the past now and there is nothing I can do to change it and fretting over it is a waste of time and energy. I can only hope that I learn from some of those mistakes and turn them around to my advantage (if thats possible).

So before I go to bed tonight I'm going to spend a few minutes reflecting on where I'm at and where I'm heading. I'm not making any huge statements about vowing to do a, b, c and so on. I think its just time to get on with it. Focus on what I want. Believe in myself and apply myself.




Deb: I'll PM you about the stuff thats concerning me. Thanks for your continued support.

Nic/Shelly: focussing on "the day" ahead and forging ahead. At 6 weeks out there is no more time for stuffing around...hey!!

Rae: thank you for that wonderful bit of inspiration from Ralph. I am printing it off and placing it in a number of key spots (the front of my Training Journal/the partition I face at work/the pantry door).

Last night I realised that I've been carrying a lot of anger bottled up in me as I dont like to vent it and get people hurt or off-side. So I pulled out a piece of paper and wrote it all down with no intention of passing it on to the people concerned. My intention was to get it down on paper and then let go of it all.

Well I woke up feeling crabby, moody and much for my "anger release strategy" LOL!!!
I have the day off today which is a good thing. I had a shoulders/bis/calves session to do and my usual cardio which I just got on with (in my crabby, moody and negative state). BUT while I rode my exercise bike I reread some of Craig Harper's Fatitude. VOILA!!!! Reality check!! No point in being angry with people as I now understand why they're doing the things they are. Plus Craig has given me the proverbial "slap in the face" I needed to overcome my pathetic disposition.

I'm writing this with a smirk on my face, feeling tons better than when I woke up and knowing that I'M GOING TO HAVE A GOOD DAY :-)

Hope you all do too.

Cheers Magda

Wednesday, August 22, 2007


I’m wobbling along this week.
With a sick hubbie, sometimes mum duties encroach on my training times.
Battling the diet demons.
Thinking lots about where I’ve come from :-) and where I want to head for October and beyond.

The “6 Weeks Out” mark is getting closer (this Saturday) and I’m planning my strategy for success (famous last words). So I need to take stock of my strengths (and capitalise on them), my weaknesses (and find ways to manage them) and my goals (which just need reinforcing daily).


Tuesday, August 21, 2007


I didnt have a good afternoon or evening yesterday as I (mistakenly) let my posing coaches' comments get to me. To make matters worse I then slept badly and missed my morning cardio in an effort to get barely enough sleep so that I'd be ok at work. I missed out on some much needed sleep on the weekend too so I'm mindful of this negative trend taking too much of a hold.

Oh well!! Just a couple more obstacles to get around...but cant say I havent had plenty of practice with that :-) Trying to look forward with positive thoughts and intentions again.



Monday, August 20, 2007


Today I had my first posing coaching session as I feel that I need quite a bit of help in this area. I've been trying to "get it" at home on my own with a DVD as my "coach" but it just wasnt coming together.

So I rocked up at the gym in my lunch break and met M who taught me the compulsory and symetry round poses + a suitable relaxed pose for me. We also talked about my choice of music for my routine and she will be choreographing that too.

So there I am today in a freezing cold aerobics room in my white bikini (the ONLY one I own), lily white body, 6 inch heels and looking like I've got 7 (or probably more!!) weeks to go. In actual fact it is 7 weeks but judging by some of M's early comments I may not be "looking on track". She questioned me about diet and I confessed that yes I've had many falls off that wagon for which I was sternly told "NO MORE!!!!" and given a short lecture about how my diet was 100% precise and why it must be followed to the letter.

Then she asked how much cardio I was doing and I could tell that I wasnt cutting it in her book. Anyway the coaching was good... great actually and now I just need to practice, practice, practice. At the end of the session I asked her for direct feedback on how she thought I looked and she made some interesting comments, some positive comments and some quite disappointing ones too. Funnily enough when I got some of the poses just right, I thought I looked quite good.....but then I know where I've come from (72+kgs and body fat sitting in the high 20s/low 30s is NOT pretty LOL!!!)

C'est la vie.


Friday, August 17, 2007


Yes from ramblings to musings!! I'm dangerous when I get thinking!!

I've been musing over my journey to date and trying to make sense of some of the events I've encountered. One thing that is really evident to me is my cycling of moods and the changes in my motivation/dedication that come with that. I know deep down I'm motivated and dedicated to achieving my goal but there have been times when the motivation and dedication have gone AWOL. They have been my down and dark times and I'd love to find my way of eliminating them from my life. Now I dont mean that I never want to feel a bit down again (we all have those times) but when I do feel like that I'd like to be able to handle it better....stuffing obscene amounts of crap down my throat is not the answer but what is??

I've also mused over my body's capabilities which have exceeded my expectations. Now I must confess that I caused an injury to myself this morning as I hadnt warmed up properly and went too quickly into (heavyish) squats and my lower back is paying the price. But overall I've coped really well and this I think has been due to Josh's great programming. He has eased me up to weights I never thought I could handle and here I am blitzing them (sometimes!!)

I spend a lot of time joking about all the things I'll eat when the comp prep is over but the reality is that I actually like most of the food I'm eating (I'd just like to have a lot more of it LOL!!!). I wish I could confidently say that this way of eating has become a lifestyle but I dont feel like I'm there yet. I dont even know if I'll ever get there but I'd like to, so if anyone has any tips on that I'd love to hear them. My biggest fear is that after comp I'll balloon back to 70kgs+ and all this hard work and effort will be wasted.

So they're some of the things that have been occupying my mind lately. The social night at my son's kindy was a breeze. With glass of Diet Coke in one hand and can of Diet Coke in the other, I had no hands free to eat....PERFECT!! Plus I'd had my dinner right before going so I was satisfied (well as satisfied as one can be when one is dieting for comp LOL) for a couple of hours at least.

Good night all. Its late and I must get some shut-eye.


Thursday, August 16, 2007


Kristy from this Saturday I have 7 weeks to the WNBF in Adelaide and 8 til the Asia Pacific Championships in Sydney. Its getting exciting now as I expect things to heat up (in terms of training and diet) when I'm 6 weeks out. Psychologically I think I'm ready for it so its not overly daunting. Physically I'm tired but not to a point which I cant manage.

Yes Kie a summer prep would be so much more pleasant wouldnt it? When I started training in December last year I really loved my early morning runs. The more I sweated the happier I was (wierd!! I know). Diet is always challenging and I disagree that its easier in summer. BULLSH*T I say!! There is just so much more socialising in summer that temptations to drink and have nibbly food/party food etc are everywhere. Its actually harder I think. Plus I love icecream so thats another major summer temptation for me. But having said all that, I'm still happier when I'm hot as opposed to cold so summer wins!!

I missed training with Kristy this morning (she probably thinks I'm a big slacker LOL!!). BS had come into our bed during the night. WH vacated our bed and went to watch the soccer/sleep on the sofa and I didnt want to wake him up at 5 as I know he's battling another cold and a night of little/no sleep. I eventually did a ride on my exercise bike so didnt miss cardio all together but its not as good as a solid sprint session.

Trained shoulders and bis last night and found some strength I didnt know I had. BONUS!! What a joy it is to post on my E-Training Journal that I blitzed an exercise for max reps on all sets.

Well folks I have work to get back to so its bye bye til tomorrow.


Wednesday, August 15, 2007


It wasnt a nice morning for cardio today. It was windy and cold and my pace was slower than what I would have liked. So I increased my time to compensate (even though I really wanted to take a short cut home) and had a longer/moderate intensity run instead. Just making the best out of a bad situation.

Had an amusing session in the gym last night. Looking around the cardio machines I was betting on who would fall asleep first. I mean 80% of the people doing cardio looked like they'd drop off to sleep at the fall of an eyelid.

My food is going well. Then WH tells me that there is a Parent Night at the kindy on Thursday and as interest has been low, they've decided to make it a wine/cheese night. Oh and its to discuss this semester's curriculum. ANNOYED!!! I dont need this temptation now. I dont want to be in a situation where such temptation is in my face all night. ANNOYED!!

The number on my scales has crept (or rather SHOT) back up over 58kgs. No wonder considering my "efforts" over the last couple of weeks. Surprisingly, I'm not distraught. I did the crime, now I do the time to get it back down. My weekly aim is to get it under 58 by the end of the weekend. It'll be hard work but I reckon its achievable. Josh has OKed an increase in my cals but the jump isnt THAT big that I will feel remarkably different. It should help though to curb my insatiably ravenous desire to binge.

So as you can see things are chugging along. Looking forward to the weather easing up a bit. This is the windiest (and therefore the yuckiest) its been since I started training. Bring on some warmth and sunshine :-)

Cheers all


Tuesday, August 14, 2007


1. Getting leaner. Lower numbers on the scales or body fat %s = happiness. Shallow, very shallow but true.

2. Finding new muscles which give a beautiful new shape. Shoulders to be proud of. Calves that no longer look like something only a mother cow could have loved.

3. Hitting 198 as a maximum heart rate and not feeling like I’m about to die. Running 5kms in under 30 minutes (28 to be exact!!) and being able to do it consistently and not just as a one-off fluke.

4. Oats for breakfast. My favourite meal of the day. The combination of oats, vanilla protein powder, a little LSA and lite soy milk makes my tastebuds sing.

5. Hitting new PBs on the weights. Feeling stronger and pushing further than I think I can go.

6. Knowing that I’m winning the war. I certainly haven’t won every battle, in fact I’ve been seriously downed a few times but I’ve come back fighting. And when I get up and fight again, I feel good about myself.

7. Praise, admiration, encouragement, support. Lump them on me. They all help to keep me going when the going gets tough.

8. My trainer Josh. He teaches me, he leads me, he supports me, he keeps me accountable and he puts up with all my lapses and fits of insecurity.

9. Progress pics. From dreadful to wow (and that’s still with 12 weeks to go til comp). Proof that all the hard work is paying off.

10. The journey. Since starting in December last year I’ve travelled the most amazing road. In places it was so smooth and even that I just glided over it. In places there were potholes which made me proceed with some unsteadiness. There were really rough patches where I fell over and lay there feeling hurt and bruised convincing myself it would be too hard to go on. But I did go on and my journey continues. I’m not quite there yet but I’m getting closer and I want to enjoy the rest of the ride.


Monday, August 13, 2007


She lines up for the race of her life. This is not a race about speed but one of steady consistent effort. Determination, dedication will get her through the finish line.

She equipps herself with the things she needs to succeed and the journey begins. Small steps at first, slow progress but every day one foot goes in front of the other and she inches closer to her goal.

There are many times when her progress stops, albeit temporarily. She stumbles but she she steadies herself and keeps going. There is a week where she just stalls not wanting to take steps forward at that time but knowing that the following week she will be charging ahead again.

Several months later her progress is remarkable and the finish line is looming in the not so far distance now. She takes a major fall, tries to get up and falls back down again. Another effort to get up is only short-lived and she's back down with thoughts that it'd be just too easy to stay down and concede defeat. Her tank is almost empty anyway and the race is just so tough now.

But she knows deep down this attitude will just NOT DO. She digs deep and finds nothing. Keep going. Keep going. She digs even deeper and finds her motivation and drive to get up off the ground and start moving towards that finish line yet again.

She is not a quitter and she has the desire to win.


Saturday, August 11, 2007


Yes I'm finding this journey is getting more and more difficult as time goes on. I'm still having good days where my eating is right on track and I'm enjoying the early morning cardio and weights but I'm struggling with consistency and I'm making some bad choices.

Deep down I know I shouldnt be doing this but I talk myself into it and convince myself that its ok (I'll be back on track tomorrow), I deserve it (I've done so well so far) or I need it (God only knows that no-one can survive on so little food for any length of time!!). Yes its diet that is the biggest challenge. When I'm going strong I'm invincible!! How then can the tide turn so dramatically (and more frequently now) and I'm stuffing up my progress all over again.

Things are cool at home and as time goes on it affects me more and more. I try to focus on what I have to do but I wonder if these difficult times will have a lasting effect on things at home. I look forward to the day when WH and I can sit down to a nice meal, share a bottle of wine, RELAX and enjoy each other's company without guilt or without feeling like I should be somewhere else (training or preparing meals).

Josh has told me many times to focus on the enjoyable aspects of this journey and I do try hard to stay positive. I just dont always succeed. I think some inspirational/motivational reading may well be in order if I'm to hold it all together and achieve my goal.

Good night all


Thursday, August 09, 2007


Yesterday was a big travelling for work day. 6 hours driving and a pretty gutsy meeting thrown in for good measure. I managed a powerwalk in the morning and now have sore shins. Now I remember why I particularly don’t like walking. My shins hate it!! Give me a decent run any day:-)

So after this big work day I still had to train and decided that shoulders/bis were the go. I surprised myself with my strength early in the session but by the end there was NO WAY I was able to make 12 reps on my last exercise. I think 8 ½ was my best and I was KAPUT!! I’m OK with this now though. As long as I give everything I have then I cant be expected to give more.

The people hosting yesterday’s meeting provided lunch for us and I veered a bit off my planned eating but it wasn’t serious. After that all was back on track and I’m sure there was no harm done either physically or mentally.

This morning Kristy and I did sprints again and we were both in good form for a strong session. An hour and a quarter later I was in the gym for my back/heavy legs session. Strength was fading fast on my back work and this is a little discouraging. Although Josh has dropped the weights back a little, I’m still not making max reps on some of the exercises. And because my posing is still really crappy, I worry about my back development the most. Legs went well although I was very aware that my lower back has been troubling me recently. Just means I need to be extra careful with it.

So after all that higher intensity training I’ve been FAMISHED today!! An hour after eating I’m hungry again and could just about inhale anything/everything. I was particularly annoyed that someone had left a big platter of cakes/pastries in our staff area this morning. It took ALL my willpower to resist them when I was so hungry. They’re gone now and I didn’t succumb but I did have a skim cappuccino with a friend who was very upset and needed a good chin-wag. Yes I could have had a herbal tea but I have it all day at work and the cappuccino was a real treat for me.

So there you go, a whole lot of useless nothing about me today. My BF loved her sexy red nightie and assured me it’d have the right effect this weekend….lucky her!!

Cheers all


Tuesday, August 07, 2007


I often think that I dont put enough pics in my blog so today I have included this one of my BS with his aunty J and future uncle S taken at the soccer last Sunday (I was at home training legs and doing cardio til I was knocking on death's door LOL!!) Isnt he cute in his new Adelaide United beanie??!!

Well today's cardio was an almost 50 minute powerwalk which burnt 267 cals so I was happy with that. Mind you it was a bit of a cruise compared to some of my recent sprint sessions but I'm determined to give my back the best possible chance of a full and speedy recovery so no weights tonight and will be powerwalking tomorrow as well. Then on Thursday its back to to the higher intensity stuff. My back feels much better today so this is positive and encouraging.

Today I've been sharing my Sydney news with friends at work and I love to see the excitement on everyone's faces. I also love reliving the excitement myself. I'm a self-confessed attention seeker (well I am an only child!!) and I'm always at my happiest when its all about ME.

Having said that on Saturday I saw Suzi Q who will be making my comp bikini and and I have chosen the most stunning fabric and what is (I hope) a flattering design. My excitement is building even more as these little things fall into place, or rather, as I make them happen. Still there is so much left to do but I'll slowly chip away at it and having the extra 2 weeks is a real blessing.

My weight is coming back down after the disastrous eating of last week and I know my goal comp weight is very achievable as long as I stay focussed with diet and training. A little indulgence here or there wont do any harm but now I absolutely cant afford any more major blowouts. I will remind myself of this in about 3-4 weeks time when the urge to have a good feed rears its ugly head again.

Well I better trot off to but my BF's birthday pressie as she is a year older today and deserves a bit of spoiling. I think a sexy nightie is in order for her upcoming dirty weekend getaway to Melbourne. B&T here I come.

Cheers all


Monday, August 06, 2007


Undoubtedly last week and weekend were the toughest times I've been through since starting my journey to the Figure Stage. Not even my mum's heart attack and the break in straight after were as difficult to deal with and I maintained my focus and dedication to my comp prep. You see I had my WH on my side, supporting me and we got through it all together.

But that wasnt the case in the week just gone. You see the strain of all that comp prep entails + the change over in comp dates coupled with the possibility of me competing in Sydney really put us through the wringer and there were many times when I didnt think we'd get through it all. So in response to the stress and depression I was feeling, I stuffed down more bad food to ease the pain (which of course it didnt!!) and I honestly doubted whether I'd ever make it in light of so much going against me.

Well I'm very happy to say now that we did make it through and we are both at a state where we can go on and that means so much to me. I can now focus on and enjoy my prep for........... insert trumpet fanfare in anticipation of a lead up to a climax.......the WNBF ASIA PACIFIC CHAMPIONSHIPS IN SYDNEY!!!!

Yes folks I can confirm that I'm competing in Sydney as I just cant pass up what may be a once-in-a-lifetime-opportunity for me. This is just the biggest thing for me and I'm focussed and motivated to really give it my all.

Having said that I'm actually having a day completely off training today and will only do a very light cardio session tomorrow as I'm suffering with a very sore lower back. I've noticed that overall my back is holding up very well and is much stronger than its ever been BUT when my mood is down and I'm a bit depressed then it gets very painful. Its killing me now!! I had a huge chiro treatment today and want to give it every chance to come good so I can get fiercely back into caning myself over the next 9-10 weeks. (9 to WNBF in Adelaide on 6th October and 10 to WNBF in Sydney).

Cheers all and stay tuned for details of the ride of my life :-) :-)


Friday, August 03, 2007


Yes the end is drawing near and as it does I'm glad to see it finish.

Sick kid, travel for work, days spent away from work and falling way behind, bad eating, low motivation, comp dates being changed, having to forego the chance to compete in the WNBF Asia Pacific Championships in Sydney, lower back pain and just feeling like...CRAP!!

I've had enough of all this doom, gloom and negativity its time for the tide to turn.

Tune in next time for the new and improved Magda...I promise.

Cheers all


Thursday, August 02, 2007


OMG What a week!!

BS is over his gastro and he now has a cold. Not serious but another change in routine to manage. This morning, after a 12+ hours sleep he woke up just as I was about to head out for my sprints with Kristy. I couldn’t leave him as he’d had no dinner the night before (he’d slept through it) so I knew he’d be starving for breakfast. I ended up riding my exercise bike instead. My mum is looking after him now as I cant really afford more time off work.

My WH and I have been seriously considering moving since the break-in a month ago. We’ve been looking at properties in some selected areas (yes on top of training, training, training and preparing food for hours on end, I’m also trawling the property market). This also results in hours of discussions and is likely to continue for some time. Can anyone tell me how to squeeze another 2 to 3 hours out of every day??

The WNBF show in Adelaide was just this week changed to another date. I was due to be away that weekend holidaying as the comp would have been over. Imagine my horror when I got the email about the change in date. Anyway without going into boring detail I will just say that WNBF have been exceptional in helping me get to the SA comp and I will be there on the 6th of October instead of the 29th or 30th of September. At one brief stage it looked like I might go to Sydney to compete at the Asia Pacific Championships but that didn’t eventuate.

I have kept up my training despite all of these challenges but diet is suffering and I will admit that my focus is not as strong as before. I've noticed that since my mood has been down and darker I'm more prone to injuries and my lower back is very sore again. Its funny how the physical and mental are so closely linked and have a definite effect on each other. I need to take some time to myself to regroup and recharge my motivation and enthusiasm which seem to have gone into hiding.

I have a catch up with my BF (best friend) tomorrow evening so that I can yarn over all the things which are bothering me. Then I can let go of them and hopefully move forward again. There’s nothing like a decent heart to heart with a smart, experienced, level-headed, totally trustworthy woman when you feel like the world is against you and you’re coming apart at the seams.

Saturday marks the start of a new AND HIGHLY IMPROVED week for me. I want to be ready to embrace it.


Wednesday, August 01, 2007


to all the wonderful supportive ladies who left words of encouragement and offers of further help after my last post.

I havent gotten back in touch with anybody personally as I have had a sick child and travel for work so my blog has been neglected since I posted. I have exchanged several emails with Josh though and I think that has helped to get me out of the rut and moving forward.

I know also for me that sometimes I just have to hit rock bottom before I bounce back and I think I did that on Monday when I trained despite floods of tears and wanting to quit after each rep/set. I knew that there was light at the end of the tunnel when I finished each rep, each set and therefore the whole session without quitting.

I have some more significant news to post but will do this later as I need to spend some time with my BS who is still off kindy and I'm home again today. There is so much going on right now both comp wise, on the home front and in my head that I'm just reeling with it all right now.