Friday, February 06, 2009

SLAYING THE BINGE MONSTER AND PUTTING THE 3-WEEK CURSE TO BED

I've been teasing with the promise of an announcement and at the risk of sounding like a total twit I'm gonna make it and throw caution to the wind.

I've posted many times previously about my 3-week curse where I have for a very long time not been able to go for more than (if I even make it to) 3 weeks without having an eating binge. My triggers are many and varied and my resolve is usually weak where I actually talk myself into them with silly justifications like "well I deserve it for ????? reason" or "it wont matter because I know I can diet it off on ...whenever" or whatever arguement suits the occassion, as long as I have just cause to do it. Silly silly me. I've been my own worst enemy for a long time.

The last few weeks have presented many of my binge triggers -

pressure at work (oh I need something nice to eat to make me feel better)

stressing about work (hmmm some yummy food will take my mind of it)

frustration at work (well a good dose of fat and sugar will make it go away)

the all or nothing mentality (oh well I've eaten off plan so I might as well stuff in as much off-plan food as I possibly can and then diet again tomorrow)

the over-feed that comes from being over-hungry (oops when I started eating, I just couldnt stop)


I'm sure many of you recognise these foes and have faced them yourselves.

Well it has now been OVER THREE WEEKS WITHOUT A BINGE FOR ME. (Shouting from the rooftops!!). I've been tempted many times as I've listed above but I've faced it head on and dealt with it.

So what did I do?

1. I recognised the danger times and evaluated them for what they were. Like when the urge came on at work (as it often does) I took a minute to work out what was bothering me.

2. Then its a case of self-talk. Do I REALLY want to stuff down heaps of crappy food or do I want to address the real problem? (Well I rightly chose the latter)

3. Then its time for action. Even if its one small thing that starts to fix the problem, I do it so I feel like I'm back in control and I dont need the food.

4. Finally, I wasnt always able to make the problem go away completely and there were times when I had to sit with my yucky feelings but I toughed it out and eventually the clouds cleared and the silver linings showed through.

5. And when they did, I felt good that I wasnt then dealing with the even worse feelings that binging leaves you with - like that sense of failure, loss of control and self doubt.

Have I slayed my Binge Monster for good? Maybe not, but right now I'm well ahead in the fight and I'm not about to give up that lead.

Is my 3-week curse broken? Right now it is and that gives me even more confidence to keep that Binge Monster down. If I did it you can do it too. Give it a try the next time the Binge Monster tries to get the better of you.

Cheers all

Magda

8 comments:

Lia Halsall said...

That's incredible news Magda. You've finally done it. You must be feeling so proud of yourself, I know I am. ;o) xxx

Frankie said...

Whoo hoo!! Well done Magda!

That's fantastic. I know that monster myself and more than 3 weeks is awesome!

Tearose said...

Hey god job!! But I think I have the answer, you need to quit work! lol Just kidding, but seriously I know that feeling too, good job :D

ss2306 said...

CONGRATS Magda.

Awesome awesome job.

little rene said...

Excellent work Magda :)

That is MASSIVE progress! Yay!

Pip said...

Hi Magda! AWESOME stuff!!!

You did it!!!

I'd been going along rather well the last 3 weeks or so pleased with my efforts till last night! Hmm, fav wine on special, = purchased. Opened, then enjoyed 3/4 of bottle, (3 glasses) and tipped remainder down sink so I didn't drink a whole bottle. Was feeling good and the feeling of drunkness didn't hit till over 2 hours later. Stomach felt weird like alcohol was swimming in it and while I wasn't exactly hungry, (had tea etc) I had the mental munchies. I toyed with the idea of eating, - felt habitual and appealing, (could have just drunk water and gone to bed). I gave in though and had maybe 200g grapes, then 2 slices of toast with low fat cottage cheese, thick avocado, cherry tomatoes and a smear of vegemite and 20g of fetta crumbled on top, then felt like chocolate and ate one Biggest Loser protein bar, at maybe 11pm. Whoops!
Now in past I have had binges much worse and miles bigger than this. That was maybe an 800 cal 'glitch'.

There is a servo next door to me which at least I didn't visit for chocolate last night, (something I've been known to do many a time).
But am still a tad disappointed in self. I'm really making sure it doesn't go further and it pushes scales up about 0.6 so I found. No more alcohol unless it's an occasion and with company!!!

Kristy said...

That's fantastic Magda. Three weeks is an awesome effort

Magda said...

Lia, I finally did it and I feel great.

Frankie, 3 weeks was my downfall every time. I never even made it there so now I'm stoked.

Hey Yvette, I oftent think that too, except it pays the bills so I have to put up and shut up :-)

Thanks Shelley, when I think back to how hard thats been before, I do feel like I've made an awesome achievement.

Yes Rene, for me it certainly is.

Pip, hang in there and put last night behind you and make good choices today. The small gain will go quickly if you get right back on track.

Thanks Kristy, you also know how hard its been for me so you know how much this means to me.

Thanks guys

Magda