Sunday, July 29, 2007

MY PERSONAL DARKEST HOUR

I should have seen it coming as its happened before. I ignored the warning signs and let it creep up and take hold. I may just have blown my chances of competing this year.

Earlier in my prep Josh has said that this journey would teach me things about myself that I didnt know. Well I knew this and I honestly thought I could and would overcome it but I havent.

I'm in a very difficult and challenging place right now and I'm not sure that I have it in me to find my way out. Even now I'm staring at this stupid computer screen at a loss for words that make sense. I dont know whether to cry because of disappointment, cry because of anger and frustration or just cry for help.

Magda

9 comments:

combatgirl said...

Hi Magda,

Sorry to hear you are feeling this way. Figure out what YOU want to do and WHY YOU want to do it. Once you have your pros and cons the decision should be a easy one.

Stay Strong and do what you feel to be the best thing for YOU.

We are all here for you so if you need to cry just do so, I know we all have our darkest moments but because of all the support through family and friends we get through them and persevere with our goals and dreams.

GOOD LUCK

Alicia said...

hey magda - send me a PM if you need to chat. i know what you're going thru xo

Kie said...

I'm sorry to hear things are dark for you right now. As hard as it is really try to find something positive and focus on that (-:
Kie xx

stacytoby said...

Oh Magda, I so know what you're going through. Send me an email at tomandstacy@bigpond.com and we'll have a chat.

Stacy

Lia Halsall said...

You're not alone Magda and trust me when I say that the first year is simply the worst and it gets better from there. Allow the balance of good days bad days, dust yourself off and take one steap at a time. It's not easy but you can do this! :o) xx

LizN said...

Magda

You know where to find me if you need help.

Hugs
Liz ;)

Di Broeren said...

Hi Magda
My heart goes out to you as I can feel where you are right now. A new day is around the corner and I hope with it your strength, faith and belief in yourself grows stronger.

Di
X

Ali said...

Magda, I hope you are feeling a lot better by the time you read this and like everyone else my heart and best wishes go out to you, hang in there and tomorrow is a new day, and please try not to be so hard on yourself and focus on how very far you have come ;)

Alixxxx

Splice said...

Reading your post makes my heart go out to you. I went through alot furing my first comp prep and it was my blog friends who helped me through especially Lia who really helped get me to the stage.
Magda you have my email, please contact me if you need another ear.
Hugs,
Deb