ON THE DEFENCE - AGAIN

I started the day with a foot to metal meeting with you know who. I was happy with my drop of 2.3kgs - most of which is bloat and fluid - but I figure "better gone than hanging on my body". What a nice start to my day :-)

If I've completed all my planned weekly training then I have Friday morning off and dont set an alarm. This in itself is a massive treat. Today I made up for this by walking home from work. It was a decent 45 minutes and I managed to keep a fairly good pace, despite catching "dont walk" signs at many intersections. Wine and nibbles tonight were kept in check but still enjoyed.

Tonight I found myself defending my decision and actions at home having felt like I was being accused of going overboard with my dieting......again. Geez, give me a break. Why criticize me for recognising that things had gotten too relaxed on both the diet and training fronts and I had gained weight.  Surely taking action now before the weight gain got worse is a good thing??!!
I found myself stating the obvious in that if I was going overboard I would:

1. not be drinking any wine
2. not be eating any nibbles
3. be weighing and measuring every morsel of food I consumed
4. be recording all my food on CalKing and analysing it to the nth degree
5. be miserable and depressing to be around - (who knows maybe I am LOL)

At the end of the day I must remember that I cant control what others say and think but I can control how I react. Will handle it better next time - after I've given Peter a good slap across the head for being so irrational and critical LOL

M

TICKING THE IMPORTANT BOXES

This morning I was woken early by the sound of rain. Immediately my mind went to thoughts of "oh I cant get out there to do my morning walk". I turned my alarm off and planned to go back to sleep. But once I'm awake, I'm awake and it took but a few minutes to decide that getting up and walking was a good idea. So I did and felt so much better for it. I was due to meet a couple of friends for breakfast before work and getting there would have been a 35 minute walk. Then breakfast was cancelled but yippee I had already walked and no exercise was missed today.

Food wise today was a bit of a go with the flow day and thats ok because life is not a 100% planned and predicatble adventure. I was holed up interviewing all day so set meal times just werent possible. I did my best and am happy with it.

No headaches today so maybe my body is adjusting to this wonderful cleanliness. Water with lemon and/or green tea (with vanilla) consumption has been great so basically I'm ticking the important boxes. Now to just do it day after day, after day and not let the destructive thought patterns and excuses start creeping in.

Next challenge is Friday night wine and nibbles including wine with dinner. This has been a bit of a downfall lately and its an area that needs better management and control. So I'll need to be really mindful of how I feel and the internal dialogue that takes place. Focus Magda, focus and you can find what works for you.

Cheers all

Magda

SUGAR WITHDRAWAL??

After a spell where my sugar consumption crept into the too high category, my decision to remove it from my diet (not permanently but certainly to be an occassional treat) has had its consequences. Is it possible to have sugar withdrawal symptoms that are like like a mild detox?

I still have some coffee (that too has been cut back a bit though) so ist not caffeine withdrawal but I notice that I'm waking up with a mild headache or perhaps getting one at the end of the day. My dinners have been on the light side with the focus being on protein and mainly green veges and I'm enjopying this refreshing change but by the morning I feel my body saying "hey dude, where's the sugar??" Similar at night after a day of no refined sugar consumption and just one or two pieces of fruit and maybe a small serve of sultanas to sweeten my porridge. I found that soaking the sultanas with the oats and bran overnight adds enough sweetness so that no extra sugar or honey is required. Genius, arent I??!!

But all this is really mild and not causing any concern. I do find it interesting though.

This morning I ventured back onto the MM for a foot to metal meeting and was happy to see over 2kgs of bloat gone. Nice start but I know its just bloat from fluid and extra food consumed on Sunday. However what is left is extra fat sitting on my thighs and stomach most noticeably. Sadly the 2kg drop doesnt put me back in my happy place :-(

So I'm soldiering on with my plan and re-forming good habits that will bring success. A slimmer and trimmer body will soon be mine and I'm ready for it, thats for sure!

Cheers all

M

HERE'S TO DIFFERENT

There are some great ideas and perspectives that I'd love to blog about but again I start blogging late in the day when I'm tired and those thoughts just dont gel any more. I'm a bit disappopinted as I'd like to write some better stuff than my late night ramblings about not much at all. Oh well maybe tomorrow I'll get an earlier start and produce something better.

It feels quite good to be focussing a little more on weight loss through improved diet and exercising consistently. I look towards the future with lots of positive feelings and a quiet belief that it wont be too long before I'm back in my happy place with how I look and feel. The key difference this time is that I refuse to become anal and obsessive about it. I know what needs to be done and yes its early days, but I'm just doing it with minimal fuss and fanfare.

I'm also toying with some habits and behaviours that I dont normally practice. I believe that different things work at different times and I'm not so set in my thoughts and ways that I wont do things differently to see if I can improve. So here's to different. Different habits. Different thoughts. Different beliefs. Different (and better) results. I look at it as experimentation and the quest to find what is ultimately right for me. I'll write more about this as I experiment further.

Again today my system thanked me, this time for drinking more water and some green tea (with vanilla). Things are working better already - although I'm sure there was a distinct protest that the sugar supply had been cut off. Well get used to it as the sugary foods have been banished to the "occassional treat" file and will not be daily event. Long live the lean and clean foods - my (re)new(ed) best friends. LOL

M

DRAWING THE LINE IN THE SAND AND THE 11TH COMMANDMENT: THOU SHALT NOT SELF DIAGNOSE

My day started with a foot to metal meeting with my trusty old foe, the Metal Monster. The line had to be drawn in the sand and it was with no surprise on my behalf. I wasnt happy with the number but I'm determined that it will come down. Painful experience completed and time to move on.

All treats were finished off over the last few days. Mum sent home a slice of my delicious birthday cake and I had it while watching Dancing With the Stars. I didnt want to be indluging today and I couldnt bring myself to ditch it. Even though I wasnt hungry for it, I still enjoyed every single mouthful - and therein lies one of my challenges. I LOVE FOOD and often eat a lot more than I need because it just tastes so bloody good. Portion control is not one of natural talents.

Training today was a 40 minute fast walk with plans to introduce walk/jogs on the weekend and then some light jogging next week. I'm esaing back into it after time off for my SIJ and then a week of almost non-existent training last week. It was really cold this morning (as usual) and I love the cold, refreshing air on my face as I power along. Very invigorating!!

Food was great with eggy oats for breakfast (sultanas added for sweetness), one skim cappuccino (my small daily treat), pink salmon and a huge salad for lunch, a pear and a small handful of almonds for afternoon tea and then left over Greek marinated lamb with brussel sprouts (a favourite of mine) for dinner. I can hear my body rejoicing with "yay she's eating fruit and veges again and cutting out the crap." To which I respond "Well body, its time you were treated better. You deserve it.".

Finally I decided that a visit to my GP was in order as I was no longer convinced that my neck rash was psoriasis. And he confirmed that it isnt. Lucky me, I've picked up a fungal infection :-( No wonder all the dietary changes were making no difference. At least now I can relax and continue to enjoy dairy foods, white flour (although this wont be high on my consumption list), red meat and alcohol (another item being severly cut back). What a relief to be given cream to treat it and know that I shall soon be rid of it.

Cheers all

Magda

NOT DEFENDING - JUST EXPLAINING

One of the things I love most about blogging is the myriad of experiences, perspectives, beliefs and skills that exist when it comes to weight loss / weight  management.

There is and always be those that live the body building lifestyle. They eat clean and enjoy treats / cheats depending on where they are in the competition cycle - off season = some cheats and / or treats; on season = very few, if any cheats / treats. Diet is usually pretty structured to strict and is followed to the letter (or pretty close to). Plus full blown train-til-you're-knocking-on-death's-door weight training and varying levels and types of cardio. Its pretty hard core but those that do it, usually love it and live and breathe it. Whilst that lifestyle is not my choice now (I have done it once) I still admire and respect those that choose it.

At the other end of the spectrum are the intuitive eaters who have successfully tuned into their bodies needs both physically, emotionally and spiritually and follow their instincts / intuitions about what, how much and when to eat. They are not bound by meal times, prescribed diet plans  and a list of shoulds / should nots. They choose exercise they enjoy and claim that this approach gives them a a sense of freedom, liberation, true enjoyment of and appreciation for life (and much more I'm sure).

I have sat at both ends of the spectrum although I dont believe that I truly mastered either one. The body building lifestyle didnt suit me and put a huge strain on my marriage and home life. At one stage I was so obsessed with my diet that I would weigh every morsel of food, write it down, enter it on CalKing, analyse it and stress over my macros like it was the most important thing in the world. I could not share a meal because I wouldnt know how much of each ingredient I was eating therefore I couldnt analyse it. If thats not insanity then I dont know what is.

About this time last year I made a commitment to never diet again and started my own journey to intuitive eating - or I prefer to call it "mindful eating". (There is a myriad of reasons why 100% intuitive eating just doesnt work from a practical perspective for me). I've had my ups and downs. I've learnt a lot and come a long way. And those who read my blog regularly will know that it hasnt all been smooth sailing and there have been many stormy seas to navigate. I'm proud to say that I did find balance and that my sould destroying binging did reduce. However I havent said a final farewell to it yet.

But the truth and reality is that lately the pendulum has swung too far into the relaxed eating side of the equation and I have the extra kilos weighing me down, making a lot of my clothes too tight and making me feel blaaah. I need to shift the pendulum back to a place where those kilos come off and stay off. I have never been a happy fat person and this itself has often motivated me to keep my weight at or below a certain level. This is not  a bad thing.

So my plan is to eat mainy clean unprocessed foods, train for at least 30 minutes a day, 5 x / week and keep the treats well under control. Yes I will impose some personal rules about what I eat and how often as I've found that the lack of those rules has got me where I am now. I wont be following a strict diet. I wont be recording and analysing everything but I will be gearing my lifestyle up for weight loss.

I do agree 100% that we each need to find what works for us. There is no one size fits all solution. I've read some self help books that others raved about  and that got brilliant reviews and they were totally lost on me. I came away thinking that I just didnt get it. Some other self help books have been brilliant eye openers and have made a difference to my life. As for what works for me - well I'm still discovering it and mastering it as I go. I just know that I'm not alone on this journey. If weight loss and maintenance was simple and easy, then squillions of people around the world wouldnt finding it so challenging to master. Hail to those that have discovered the secret, found their answers and are living the exact life they want.

:-) Magda

BIRTHDAY HOORAY

I'm not sure what inspired me to do a 9 day celebration of my birthday this year but thats where I'm heading and at day 7 I'm seriously over it.

I started last Saturday with a lovely dinner out at The Rising Sun Inn which is conveniently a short walk from home. The other events of note were: lunch out on Tuesday, lunch out on Wednesday, birthday cake Wednesday night, left over birthday cake on Thursday night, birthday morning tea on Friday, lunch out on Friday and so it goes on. It'll finish on Sunday night (thank god!!).

Somebody needs to remind the Fatness Fairy that birthday calories DONT COUNT!!!! She is clearly of a differing opinion and has bestowed upon me an unwanted birthday gift of a few extra kilos. My lord, were my jeans tight today :-(

So on Monday I delve back into the "D" world. Stuff this bloody intuitive eating (or I call it mindful eating), I have kilos to lose and its time to put those oars back into the water and start rowing. I need structure. I need more discipline. I need a damned good consistent effort. And I need a different mind-set (which I'm working on).

This is not a sentence. This is not  deprivation or being a slave to somebody else's rules. Its about sucking it up, putting in the effort and doing what it takes to get back to my physically happy place. Join me from Monday to follow my ?????? (I need a snazzy title and will try to come up with one whilst finishing off my celebrations).

Cheers all

M

PSORIASIS SAGA AND SILLY SACRO ILIAC

PSORIASIS SAGA

Well here is my psoriasis in all its ugly and itchy glory. The picture doesnt do it justice as its often quite red, dry and scaly. Not to mention itchy.

For some weeks now I've made a half reasonable effort to get rid of it through diet alone. This has worked well for me in the past and I believe it will still work. The problem has been that I'll follow the psoriasis ridding principles for a few days and then I'll slacken off. So it starts to go but never finishes.

It was looking quite hopeful on Monday and Tuesday as it was very mild but then after dinner on Tuesday it turned red again and itched like mad. I had trouble getting to sleep. Sadly I had actaully been quite good with my diet and could only put the flare up down to one thing .... a little extra wine :-( :-(

The writing is on the wall and I'm reading it but action will have to wait til birthday celebrations are over. Sadly I think that in this situation it has to be all or nothing .... a 100% effort to finally shake it. I even found my trusty old cream and started using it, despite the use by date being well and truly in the past. A fresh tub is on the shopping list for next week though.

So yes I'm being a total spoilt brat, sooky lala and WILL NOT compromise my birthday celebrations which start tomorrow. The buckling down will have to wait til after that. Then its no white flour, no dairy, no red meat, severely reduced alcohol intake and increased intake of oily fish until my neck/throat is clear again. How hard could that be??

SILLY SACRO ILIAC

Whilst I havent nailed the elimination of my psoriasis, I have actually completed two weeks of no lower body training whatsoever. GO ME!!!

After completing the HM and taking no decent rest break I paid dearly by suffering an inflamed sacro iliac joint. OMG it was so painful to run and even walk. I saw a sports med doctor as I honestly didnt know what was wrong. All I knew was that something was very wrong. So after the diagnosis she prescribed a low dose anti inflamatory and two weeks of rest. Eegads no running :-(

The first week was a disaster as I had a week of inner turmoil which translates into outer over eating. I felt like I gained about 5 kilos in that week alone. Then I had a bit of an awakening (yep another one), a bit of re-alignment (oh yeah know how to do that) and set myself back onto the path I want to travel (better to keep on trying than to throw in the towel). I ventured back into my cluttered and messy training room and just ... trained  ..... doing what I could with what I had in whatever space there was. All upper body work and then today some prehab work ala Liz to get the lower body back into order again. Every session was short, intense and hard and left me feeling so much better. Ah the power and wonders of training :-)

I'm ready now to ease back into the lower body work. I plan to do some walking then some walk / jogs and then introduce running about 1 - 1.5 weeks from now. Fingers crossed that the SIJ is all ok.

Finally I had to share this pic of my hard working family. Precious arent they??

STATUS UPDATE

Tonight I thought I'd bore you all to death with a status update on a few bits and pieces. I'll start with a goal I set myself a few weeks ago.

ARTIFICIAL SWEETENER FREE BABY

I've been successful in ditching the ASs. I started by cutting out my daily love affair with sugar free lollies. My how I loved to munch away on them throughout the afternoons while chained to my computer at work. Yes I did miss them terribly at first, often reaching over for the packet which was no longer there. Sob. Sob. But I got past it all and then tackled the AS yogurt and changed over to snacking on almonds and a piece of fruit in the afternoon. Slowly my last bottle of sugar free maple syrup ran out and my breakfast oat/protein pancakes were sweetened up with apple sauce which was surprisingly better than I thought it would be. I felt really sad when I ate my last pancake with maple syrup on it. Apart from that there wasnt really any other AS in my diet. I have a bit of soy protein left and I notice that's artificially sweetened but I havent needed it so it sits on my desk at work. As for the Diet Coke, we are no longer having a casual affair and not a drop has passed my lips for longer than I can remember.

So what is the outcome of this? Its hard to judge because as this was taking shape, my diet ... shall we say  ..... wasnt at the better end of the spectrum erhum erhum. Now that I've cleaned it back up and things are more settled with me I can honestly say that I feel no different. No better. No worse. Not noticing any changes in how my body works or feels.

Did I expect things to change? Well let me put it this way. With all the bad press that ASs get and how we are bombarded with how bad they are for us, I guess I expected to feel somewhat better when I cut them out. In comparison, if I have a few days of crappy eating where I really overdo the sugary, processed, fatty foods I feel worse and of course by cutting them out and going clean there is a noticeable improvement in how I feel. Well the AS changeover had no such effect. I never felt "bad" having them (except for one bout of too many SF lollies giving me a ripper of a stomach ache) and cutting them out didnt make me feel any better.

Lets just say, I'm not convinced that I'll stay AS free from here on. As long as my intake stays low then I'm not going to stress about it.

THE MEDITERRANEAN DIET

We had great intentions with this one but old habits die hard and making a noticeable switch to the principles of this eating plan didnt really come off. We were never going to do it 100% but fell way short of that anyway. Maybe down the track we'll be a bit more committed to giving it a better go but right now we're cruising along in our comfort zones with our normal diet. Peter is more committed to training regularly (not being sick 80% of the time helps) and is maintaining his weight well considering he gains every winter. And for me the challenges come from the emotional side of eating so when I get that right it all works pretty well for me.

THE PSORIASIS SAGA ....

... deserves its own post with a warning that I may include a picture and an honest update. Watch this space (I know you just cant wait for that one!!!).

M

WHAT IS THE WORLD COMING TO?

Being on holidays this week I get to indulge in the truly informative world of daytime TV. Does anybody else share my love/hate of this special domain? As I was eating my breakfast in front of channel 7's 9am show (is it called Today? I hardly ever watch it) I caught the most fascinating and at the same time most infuriarating feature story. It was about "Gainer Bloggers" (sorry I'm not linking to it or anything as I cant be bothered searching them out). Who/what are they you ask?

They're morbidly obese people who are actively trying to increase their weight and they're doing it in a public domain through blogs. They featured the "world's fattest mum" who's goal it is to get to 450kg. Yes you read right 450 KILOGRAMS. Apparently she has a blog where she posts her food intake, photos of her gorging herself, photos of her in bikinis and comments such as "fat is sexy". Some of her followers even send her food to help her cause.

I found myself staring in fascination at what makes these people tick.

Are they seeking out their 15 minutes of fame?
Are they so over dieting and trying to lose weight that they've decided to swing the opposite way and by going public and rallying a support base do they justify their actions?

I listened to the story of the mother aiming for 450kgs with pictures of herself in a bikini posted on her blog and all I could think of was her kids. OMG where do I start?

What message is she sending her kids about personal values?
What message is she sending her kids about living a healthy lifestyle?
How will other kids treat her kids if/when they find out what she does (and they WILL find out)?
If she dies at a young age (which is almost certain) what will happen to her kids? Does she ever stop to think about that?

Then I felt sad to think that her life revolved around this tragic goal (and it did because she physically could do little else) which is a thinly veiled death sentence.

So for those of us who sometimes struggle with emotional eating and would like to be about 5 to 10 kilos lighter I have one thing to say "baby we've got NOTHING to worry about".

THE END

PS Feel free to shoot me down or join me on my soap box but this really pressed my buttons and I've put it out there as I see it.

.... ONE GIANT STEP FOR MY COMMITMENT

Isnt it interesting?? I make a commitment to permanent change to live a lifestyle based on leanness, fitness and vitality. So when I go to a cafe purely for a soy cappuccino (off dairy til my psoriasis goes - yeah I know I've been saying this for a while) the dessert cabinet is groaning with every imaginable cheesecake, banana caramel pie, flourless orange cake and I could go on and on. Everything looks superbly delicious. I'm hungry and could easily polish off any one of the delectable temptations calling my name. Last week I would have.

So today I looked at them and acknowledged how great they looked and no doubt how delicious they'd be (yes I have a sweet tooth like there's no tomorrow). And then I let those feelings and thoughts go, enjoyed my cappuccino and kept my appetite for dinner.

One small step for man one giant step for my commitment.

:-) Magda

HOW COOL IS BEING ON HOLIDAYS!!??

Got up at 8. No training today as upper body is riddled with DOMS and lower body training is banned until SIJ settles down. Pottered around. Ate breakfast around 9.30 then the fun started: baking gingerbread biscuits, baking a banana and coconut cake, my boy decorated the biscuits making a special heart shaped biscuit just for me, watching a dvd, playing solitaire on the computer, playing our version of good guys vs bad guys, out for a coffee (me) and biscuit (my boy) and doing an outer space activity sheet from last week's paper and then home.

Geez I could get used to this ..... as long as my pay landed in my bank account each fortnight LOL.

Cheers

Magda

THE NEW MOON ECLIPSE

True to my word I have spent the last 2 days taking small positive steps towards my ultimate goal. I've completed 2 upper body training sessions incorporating  ???? sets (what do you call them when you combine 3 exercises instead of 2??) and taking only minimal rest between sets. My weights have been moderate to heavy and I've enjoyed that nice shattered feeling through my arms on completion. All up the sessions are short and intense and then I get on with my day. Lord knows what I'll do tomorrow as I'm trying to give my SIJ complete rest and am not sure if walking (like powerwalking) is off limits too.

On Saturday I scaled my food RIGHT BACK to balance out some excesses from the last few days. It actually felt really good to have my tummy rumbling again asking for food instead of that familiar feeling of being overfull. I went to bed feeling so much better for taking these positive actions. Shame that I had a really crappy nights sleep but will hit the sack soon.

The new moon eclipse in Cancer happens early tomorrow morning and its said to be time when significant change is likely. New moons usually promote change anyway but being an eclipsed new moon, its meant to be far more intense. Well my comment is "bring it on baby". I know that its entirely up to me to implement the changes I want to make but at the end of the day, I'm not going to say no to a little metaphysical help LOL.

Good night all.

Magda

MY COMMITMENT: PERMANENT CHANGE

Today I finished work at 5pm feeling like a wrung out rag. It was a very busy and demanding day to wrap everything up so I can take a week off. The pressure, amongst other things has resulted in many poor food choices, not to mention the paltry amount of training that I've managed lately.

Tonight I asked myself: "Do I like how I look and feel?" The answer was an immediate and obvious "NO". Then do something about it.

Stop thinking. Stop analysing. Stop assessing and re-assessing. Stop talking about it. Stop writing about it and start DOING.

I’m on holiday from today and couple that with the new moon eclipse in the early morning of the 12th and the planets may (should) just align to promote permanent change. That is my goal. That is my commitment. Wish me luck.


Time to formulate my plan of attack for tomorrow. Good night all

Magda

TRAINING ANALYSIS AND NEW PROJECTS

Oh my lord, Tuesday's upper body circuit has transported me to that familiar old planet of pain called DOMS. I'm coping with the sore pecs and the other muscle groups obviously werent pushed hard enough but my abs ARE KILLING ME. Plus its all made worse by the fact that I have a niggling cough left over from when I was sick and of course every cough = more DOMS pain. My how quickly we lose what we no longer train.

Which has got me thinking about my recent (like last 10 or so months) approach to training and where it has got me. I'm actually not happy with where I am.

When we moved house in September last year my weight training scaled right down and I started running more. I was quite happy doing this so I cranked up my running and scaled the weights back to nothing. I committed to do a half marathon so the running cranked up even more and there was no energy for any other training (I would take the stairs at work to go up one floor - thats how tired my legs were!!). So much for weight training to maintain my upper body muscle tone pffft no longer on the agenda.

So where did all this get me? Well I achieved my goal of running the half but post race enthusiasm overcame me and I rested for something like 3 days before I was running again. For this stroke of brilliance I was rewarded with an inflamed SIJ and a forced 2 weeks of no lower body training. Lo and behold let me discover how my upper body has gone to crap after the neglect it was subjected to.

Ok enough waffling and analysing the past (a favourite pastime I'm sure you'll agree). Where to from here?

Sort out the words (in my head) and then take action.

Oooh I'm even a little excited about it all. I love a new project and a challenge.

Cheers all

Magda

DISCIPLINE AND CONSISTENCY

Inspired by Liz's blog last night I made a positive decision to set my alarm and do some training this morning. It would have been so easy to slip into total slothdom (great word hey??!!) but I knew that I'd then face the very difficult task of getting back into the routine of early wake-ups when it was freezing outside and my bed was so toasty. Once the habit is in place its relatively easy to keep it going. But break the habit and then try going back to it ... well that can be quite hard.

So I checked out my training room and decided that there was enough room for a workout and set up some of the weights ready to go this morning. I chose to do an upper body circuit with light-moderate weights as its been ages since I threw any iron around and just about all of my upper body conditioning has well and truly gone. It felt good and tonight I even have some DOMS as proof that I worked hard (again thats a relative term considering where I'm coming from). I followed up with some ab and core strengthening work and continued the day with a  spring in my step.

Bugger the leadership seminar I attended first up. We werent told that breakfast was going to be provided and oh boy it looked so good. Sadly my discipline and consistency didnt win out over the breakfast buffet of mini ham and cheese croissants and scones with strawberry jam and cream. My they tasted so good but in all honesty I didnt need them and they did turn into a day of not so stellar eating. At least I didnt feel the cold as much with the increased fat consumption LOL.

But back to Liz's wise words about discipline and consistency which really struck a chord and "spoke to me". They sparked a small positive change today and tomorrow is another opportunity to build on that.

M

JUNE ROUND-UP

Hmmmm today I face up to some not so pleasant truths - depending on how you look at things. In the spirit of my monthly round-ups here is my June round-up and the news is not so good. But in the interests of honesty and openness I'm putting it out there in case others can relate, take something valuable away from it or just take comfort that they're not alone.

So let me start by admitting that in the last few weeks my eating has been a lot more relaxed. The bottom line is that a lot of non-hungry eating was happening regularly. Not necessrily binging which has decreased considerably but just eating a lot more than I know I should. Add to that an increased wine consumption plus too many sweet treats and voila the Metal Monster is once again registering a number that exceeds the highest number I ever want to be (and would prefer to be a good 5kgs under!!).

I'm not surprised. I could actually feel it without having the foot to metal meeting this morning but I faced up to the number regardless. So feelings / reactions??

Feelings: Not surprised. A bit disappointed that I went overboard and now have some work ahead of me to reign it back in / down. On the other hand - geez I had some yummy stuff :-) But here's the biggie: I'M NOT ALL EMOTIONAL AND FATALISTIC ABOUT IT. Its simple really: over-eat often = weight gain (a very simple equation). Accept it and make a choice about what you do in future.

Reactions: Calm and rational. What am I prepared to do about it? What am I NOT prepared to do about it? For me this is also a no-brainer.

July is my birthday month so there will be no big X week challenge with strict dieting and gruelling twice a day training in order to torch kilos at the speed of sound. Plus I'm sidelined from running and lower body cardio and swimming just isnt going to happen. This ban on cardio will not help my cause. There will be eating out and wine to be enjoyed. So its down to the food and making smart healthy choices whenever I can and saving the real treats for the special birthday meals (of which there will be at least 4 - we dont celebrate by halves!!). Maybe less sweet treats (oh my poor sweet tooth) and keeping portions moderate (easier said than done when eating out and the food tastes SO good.).

My goal is to finish July weighing no more than what I weighed this morning. Then we'll see what August brings.

Cheers all

M

SIDELINED

For several weeks I've ignored the pain through my glutes, upper hamstrings, lower back and that general vicinity when I run, walk or get up to walk after sitting for a period. Every morning my walk or run would start with pain at about a level 6 or 7 through that area and I would literally hobble like an old person until relief came after a few minutes. Sometimes I think the relief may not have actually come but I accepted that was how my body operated and pushed on through the pain. After all, its just a bit of pain and as athletes we all know that pain is something we have to deal with. (OK I dont actually consider myself to be an athlete but I have pursued some athletic activities and therefore I can call myself a "casual athlete".)

This morning I set out to run for my usual 40 - 45 minutes and once again the pain was with me and quite strong. I pushed on for about 10 or so minutes expecting relief at any time but it wasnt coming. Then I decided that I would drop back to a walk which although still painful was quite manageable. It was then I decided to finally get this checked out and not leave it any longer as it quite clearly wasnt going to go away of its own accord.

I've seen a sports doctor who is also a runner and was surprised that she didnt find anything more obviously wrong. I know that what I'm feeling is not normal. She has suggested that my sacro iliac joint is inflamed after running the Greenbelt Half Marathon and not taking a decent rest period for a good recovery. So I have anti-inflamatories and an order for lower body rest for 2 weeks.

I have mixed feelings about this. I will do as I'm told because I really want all this pain to go so I can once again enjoy running but a part of me will feel very guilty when I'm not getting up early to do my daily cardio. I'll get out of the routine and habit and I hope that I can pick it up and go back to it easily. Aaaargh the stress of the change in routine!!!!

Maybe this is the shove I need to tidy up my training room and push some iron around again (upper body only). Hmm this is NOT how I wanted my renewed approach to health and fitness to kick off.

M