SOMETIMES YOU JUST NEED TO "BE"

This morning as I was signing invoices for payment I noticed the date already being the 10th of May. Double figures in the number stakes and I cant believe its May already. It felt like yesterday that it was still April. The year is zooming by very quickly.

In my private moments like brushing my teeth, taking a shower or just doing something on my own, I find myself reflecting on life and myself and how it all fits together. There has certainly been a shift in my thinking, my attitude and my acceptance of me. Maybe its come with age or with time or just reaching a level of maturity that you dont have in your 20s or even your 30s. However its come, I'm glad its here because I'm a much happier, calm and accepting person than I was say even 5 years ago.

I've always known that I've had a very charmed and fortunate life. I've known little if any hardship and have been blessed well with the important things like family and friends. A lot of my worries I brought on to myself because of lack of confidence, self esteem and just not accepting who I was and being happy with that. But in recent times I've found it easier to be happy within my own skin, to be more accepting of who I am and know that I'm ok.

Sometimes you need to stop chasing a dream that ultimately isnt right for you, despite how you felt about it in those heady days. Sometimes you need to look within to find answers to the hard questions. Sometimes you just need to "be", without all the analysis, goals, deadlines and pressures. Its ok to take time out when you need it. Whatever it is you're taking time out from, will be there when you're ready to go back to it.

Tonight I'll have dinner with my family and a nice long chat with my son about something thats worrying him. If I can ease his mind and get him to a point of feeling ok about it then thats the best and most important thing I could have achieved today. Everything else pales into insignificance.

M